Tweets That Make The Single Life Feel Like The Best Life

People love to pity those of us who are single, but the jokes’ on them. The single life is a great life, free of heartbreak, daily disappointment, and being locked in a toxic relationship.

We have to admit still, there are times when we miss having that special someone to cuddle with. For better or for worst, these tweets are relatable for all of us single people.

Love Language Is Sleep

Whoever came up with the five love languages clearly missed a few. Sleep should have been at the top of the list.

Sleep brings beauty, rest, relaxation, warmth, and all the things a partner takes away.

You’re Better Off By Yourself Anyway

When you start dating someone, you only have two options. Either accept and put up with them till the day you die or inevitably break up and pick up the pieces of your broken heart.

There is actually a third. Don’t date anyone in the first place.

Mother Doesn’t Know Best

Our mothers love to preach about how they were already married with eight children by the time they were our age.

They might have had someone to chew ice with during quarantine, but who was able to drink a whole bottle of wine a day without anyone around to judge? Not mother.

The Meaning Of Love

This is quite the speculation. For all we know, the man just loved his job so much he wanted to draw a heart out of the leaves he collected to show it.

Maybe it was a heart to signify the love he feels for himself. People just love to assume…

To Each Their Own

They say there is someone out there for everyone. There has to be someone out there who dreams of a woman eating rotisserie chicken with her bare hands in a parking lot.

Continue to be you and don’t settle for anyone who wants to change you!

Fair Is Fair

It’s like married people suddenly look down on you just because they signed a court document and spent all their savings in one day to wear a white dress and have a big party.

Relationship issues don’t just go away because you’re married. We’ll be living our best lives till you join us again in the singles club.

Fake It Till You Make It

If you’re not getting your desired amount of tinder matches, we have a life hack for you.

This guy figured out that if you put your pictures upside down, swiping left actually becomes swiping right.

Siri Gives Honest Dating Advice

Siri probably thought “let me do this girl a favor and just get her the answer already.” If you’re wondering how it played out, the boy simply replied with “haha.”

Then he continued to leave her on “read”. At least now she has her answers.

A New Level Of Low

People say this is a new level of low, but we say it’s a new level of health. This would indicate that you have finally stopped entertaining all the players in your life.

There is no need to go back and text your exes. Upwards and onwards!

A Holiday For Single People

Imagine how many couples would break up if a “single” holiday was real.

People’s true color and intentions would show when they are quick to dump the supposed love of their life just to get one day off work.

The Real Reason Why

The real issue is why do people need to have a reason to be single? It’s like being single is not a choice and rather a terrible circumstance that only people who have something wrong with them fall into.

We’re single so we don’t have to deal with texting people who lack basic grammar skills.

Netflix Is The One Watching

You think you’re wasting hours on end watching Netflix, but really, it’s the other way around. The whole time Netflix is gathering data on what you’re watching and for how long so it can keep you hooked and make you recommendations.

At least someone is paying attention to what you like!

Bring All The Boys To The Yard

Funny enough, this young woman’s parents did actually meet in person. There was a time long long ago where adults went to social events where they actually met potential partners in person.

Cellphones didn’t exist yet so they had no choice but to actually converse and get married.

One Can Only Eat So Much Greek Yogurt

This is actually quite a genius idea and it’s absurd that it’s not on the market yet. Sometimes you need to buy products in bulk for a great price, but not quite the Costco amount.

And, you don’t necessarily want to eat yogurt for breakfast, lunch, and dinner simply not to waste it.

How To Be Rich 101

The best part about this is that you don’t have to share to the jar or take into account where someone else wants to go on the trip. You’re the captain! The world is your oyster.

Regardless, this a great way to start saving some money.

It’s Okay To Miss It Sometimes

At the end of the day, there are days when you’ll miss being in a relationship. We want what we can’t have. However, as soon as you’re in a relationship and you’re actually angry and arguing again, you’ll miss the time you had the peace of mind of being single.

The lesson is, enjoy it while you can!