Being single when you want to be in a relationship can be really frustrating and make you feel really sad. We’ve all been there, right? Thinking that we are ready for love but not being able to really find it anywhere, not in a way that sticks anyway.
Even though it’s hard not to dwell on those frustrating feelings, there are some things to remind yourself of that might not make being single so bad.
No Relationship Is Perfect
First off, it’s important to remind ourselves that even though we may want to be in a relationship, relationships are rarely perfect.
That means that even when you do find one, it’s going to be a lot of work.
Being In A Relationship Isn’t The Key To Happiness
Dating someone isn’t the key to happiness. Being with another person isn’t going to be what makes life worth living or helps you find purpose.
It’s fun to have someone be there for you through all that stuff, but it isn’t going to fix your life.
You Can Devote Your Time To Friends And Family
Focus on the relationships that you do currently have. There are lots of different kinds of love to have in life.
For starters, you have your friends and family. And investing in those relationships will help take the edge off a bit.
You Can Devote Your Time To Yourself
I’m sure you’ve heard it a million times, but the most important relationship that you’re ever going to have is with yourself.
It’s important when you’re single to work on that relationship with yourself so you’re as strong and independent as you can be.
Relationships Take A Lot Of Time And Energy
When you’re single, all your time and energy is there for you to use for yourself, and that’s really exciting.
It takes a lot of emotional energy to be in a relationship, which often leaves less behind for you to spend on yourself.
It’s Important That You Don’t Settle
You should never settle, no matter how much you might want to find another person.
If you settle, it’s just going to end in heartache, and you deserve to have what you want in a partner.
You Get To Be Independent
Being independent is an important skill, and it’s one that we should all work on more than we do.
When you’re single, you get to flex those muscles and learn on building the skills you need to be self-sufficient.
You Get To Reflect On What You Want
You get to take actual time to think about what it is you want from your relationships and what you want from life. Make a list, start a journal, even start exploring some of these things in therapy.
You Get To Do What You Want
When you figured out what those things are outside of a relationship, you’re going to have all the time in the world to work on them.
Becoming the person you want to be is going to help you attract the right people.
You Don’t Have To Worry About Anyone Other Than Yourself
While the idea of worrying about someone else sounds exactly like what you may want, remember that right now, the only feelings you have to worry about are your own.
There is something liberating about that, about only having to worry about yourself. Take advantage of that.
You Can Watch Whatever You Want
It may not seem to be that big of a deal, but knowing that you can go home after a long day and watch whatever you want is a great feeling.
No one is going to be sitting there playing Playstation or watching The Sopranos.
You Can Eat Whatever You Want
You don’t have to have those annoying conversations where neither of you can decide what to do for dinner that night.
Feeling like Italian? Go for it. Want seafood? The world is your oyster.
You’re Open To New Opportunities
Not being in a relationship means that you’re able to try new things, whether that be going after a job that is out of town or dating people outside of your type.
The world is literally an open book, and you can write your own ending.
You Can Spend Your Money On Yourself
It is a proven fact that people who are in relationships somehow spend more money than people who are single.
When you’re single, all the money you make is your own, and you can spend it however you want.
You Have Time To Learn New Things
While those nights on your own may seem like a bummer, they are actually a great way to work on learning something new or trying out a new hobby you’ve always been curious about.
All you have is your time, so make the most of it!
You Can Work Toward Your Goals
Not having to worry about being with another person also allows you to have the time and energy to devote to your goals.
There is less sacrifice and compromise in your life when you’re single—you get to do you.
You’re Free To Make Big Life Decisions
Making big decisions is a lot easier when you’re single. You don’t have to balance your needs against someone else’s.
You can take a job in a new city, change careers, go back to school, or whatever! It’s up to you and you alone.
You Can Work On Defining Who You Are
Figuring out who you are is going to be a lifelong process, but working on it is something that is easier done when you’re single.
Like we’ve said, you get to try new things and make big decisions without having to worry about anyone else.
You Have The Chance To Explore New Things And New People
When you’re single, you can do whatever you want, and that means that you don’t have to answer to anyone and are free to try anything that you want.
This is important to think about when you’re sad about being single. It isn’t all bad, and it’s good to remember that.
Remember, Finding Love Isn’t Everything
Finding love isn’t going to be the most important thing you do with your life.
It’s totally OK to want to be in a relationship, but don’t let it be the thing that defines who you are to yourself and to others.