Oh, marriage. We’re always told that growing up, meeting the “one,” getting married, and settling down is one of the most important parts of life, but marriage isn’t all that easy. There are many great reasons why a couple might decide to take their relationship to the next level, but there are some not-so-good reasons that people do it, too.
These are the top 10 worst reasons to decide to get married.
It’s Just The Next Natural Step In Your Relationship
Perhaps you and your significant other have been together for years and you’ve hit all the other major relationship milestones—moving in together, getting a dog, etc. It might feel that marriage just makes sense.
Of course, if you both really want to get married and think it’s a good idea, that’s great! But getting married just because you feel like you’re “supposed to” is a recipe for disaster.
An Unexpected Pregnancy
Hey, it happens: you’re doing the naked tango, and you end up with a pregnancy you didn’t plan for. Some people would say that it’s only right to get married; however, if the main thing holding the two of you together is a baby, there’s a low chance of it being a good marriage.
It’s very feasible to co-parent without being married, and, if things naturally progress toward marriage, that’s great! Just don’t rush it.
Your Partner Wants To Get Married
Picture this: you and your significant other have been together for several years, and now your partner says they want you guys to get married. You don’t feel the same way—perhaps you don’t particularly believe in marriage or you just aren’t ready—but your partner is insisting.
It escalates to them giving you an ultimatum: marriage or they’re leaving. You might want to give in, but entering a marriage should always be a mutual decision by both parties. Going about it any other way will probably lead to regret and resentment down the road.
Your Religion Says You Need To Get Married Before Sex/Living Together
Listen, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with waiting until you’re married to get physically intimate or to live in the same home if that’s what you really want. The problem lies in rushing to get married just so you can do those things.
Marriage is a huge commitment to make to another person, and doing it just for a little gratification in the physical department is a rash decision.
Your Family Is Pressuring You
There’s nothing worse than rolling up to yet another family function and having everyone ask you when you’re going to settle down and tie the knot. Families have a tendency to be pushy about you getting married to the point where it can even make you want to just get it done.
However, there is no reason to live your life on a timeline other than your own. You should always wait until you and your partner are truly ready before heading down the aisle.
You’re Trying To Fix A Broken Relationship
Perhaps someone cheated. Perhaps things have just gone askew in the relationship. You might be tempted to throw a ring in there (or accept a ring) as a Hail Mary to hold together the relationship.
I think it goes without saying that you should enter into marriage when you’re in a good, stable place emotionally with a partner. You shouldn’t feel like you need to get married in order to save a relationship.
You’re Feeling Spontaneous
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas…except for marriage licenses. Running away with a partner and getting married spontaneously might seem like a fun idea in theory, but it’s a little messier in reality.
Marriage is something both parties should thoroughly think about before actually going through with it. Getting married spontaneously because of the way you feel in the moment is a huge commitment that can backfire horrendously.
You Just Want To Have A Big, Extravagant Party
Not going to lie, I’ve been thinking about what my wedding will be like since I was a kid. There are few times you get to have a large, expensive party with all of your friends and family there, so a wedding can be a pretty alluring idea.
However, a big party only lasts for one day, and a marriage is supposed to last a lifetime. In the end, if the wedding is your main reason behind wanting the marriage, you shouldn’t do it.
You Want Tax Breaks
Let’s be honest: being single comes with a lot of issues, and marriage comes with a lot of benefits like tax breaks and making it easier for a partner to get a visa, citizenship, or health insurance.
Sure, you might want to expedite your wedding in order to reap those benefits, but you shouldn’t rush into a commitment like marriage just to gain those things a little faster.
You Like The Idea Of Marriage
Movies, books, and television shows, even from when we were children, have reinforced the idea that marriage is an important goal in life. The idea of having a significant other who you love to take on the challenges of life with you seems like a pretty great concept.
It’s hard to be patient, but rushing into a marriage because you like the idea of it more than you like your actual partner is just a recipe for disaster.