Women Share The Unattractive Things Men Do
Even when we're smitten, we're not blind. There are some behaviors men are guilty of, somehow thinking they'll impress us, that actually just turn us off completely. In fact, this is why sometimes women will be attracted to someone until they hear them talk or get to know them. Then somehow that man is left there wondering what he could possibly have done wrong.
Be careful of the following topics that should be universal warnings, as shared by real women.
Being A Self-Proclaimed "Alpha"
"Telling me that you're an 'alpha.' It makes you come across as an insecure loser." —mistress-eve / Reddit
What exactly are you trying to prove? That you're better than everyone else but feel the need to announce it? Actions speak louder than words. It sounds like you're trying to convince yourself more than anything else.
Downplaying Our Interests
"Trying to prove you're better than me at the things I'm good at, or acting like the things I'm good at are 'silly' in comparison to your hobbies and interests. You don't need to prove you're 'good enough' for me, and, if you did, making me feel bad is not the way to do it." —Roe1996 / Reddit
It's like saying that some activities are just for "girls" and are therefore unworthy of you.
Acting Like Someone Else In The Beginning
"Agreeing with everything we say and do for the first four months then calling us crazy when we're upset that the person we fell for doesn't seem to exist anymore. We're just supposed to accept this whole new human who suddenly doesn't see eye to eye on things and doesn't like our personality as much as we thought." —AdrenalineJackie / Reddit
What's the point of not being yourself from the get-go if we'll both just be unhappy down the road?
Showing Off Your Wealth
"Throwing money around—I mean, I'm glad you're solvent, but I won't want to stay with you if you literally chuck money away to impress people, even if that person is currently me." —Osito509 / Reddit
Clearly, you're trying to prove something, but we're not an object that can be bought. You have to earn our love and trust, not buy it.
Wearing Too Much Cologne
"Wearing too much cologne. Just shower and use clean clothes." —aballofunicorns / Reddit
While we love a man who smells nice, we also appreciate the ability to breathe. We don't want to feel like we're suffocating because the air is too thick around you. Plus, it'll make us wonder what you're trying to cover up.
Pretending You Don't Feel Anything
"Being emotionless and acting like you're invincible." —xanara0 / Reddit
Think of it like this: we prefer to date someone of our own species, and if you're a fellow human, you naturally feel things to process them and get over them. How can you even love us if you pretend you don't feel anything?
Bragging About Your "Kill Count"
"Bragging about having slept with everyone and their mother..." —lynxlok94 / Reddit
Listen, you're free to explore your sexuality as much as you please, but if we're next, we'd rather not know about it. This won't make us think you're irresistible or great in bed. It'll just make us feel like we don't want to make the list.
Driving Like You're In The Fast And The Furious
"You swerving and speeding is NOT a turn-on. It makes me distrust you and want to get out of the car! I want to be in the car with someone who makes me feel safe! It makes you seem like you're just trying to be overly macho." —aetnaaa / Reddit
What's important to you, showing off, or keeping us alive?
Taking Your Anger Out On Innocent Objects
"When the man has explosive behaviors I feel like my uterus closes. Breaking or hitting things for any problem, that's a BIG no no for me." —lunatmbc / Reddit
What did the poor wall ever do to you to make you punch it? Learn to control your emotions and release them in a healthy way, not like a child throwing a tantrum. If you need space, just ask for it before you react.
No Means No
"Being persistent after being told no. Apparently, there are men out there that think 'no' means 'try harder.'" —Mermaid_Hippie / Reddit
There has never been a clearer statement than "no means no." Just accept the rejection with dignity. If we change our minds, we'll let you know. It's not "romantic" for you to keep on trying to "convince" us.
Belittling Our Excitement
"Bringing down girls' energy when she's really excited about something." —methziamo / Reddit
Okay Brad, maybe getting a $2 pay raise is not a big deal to you because you never had to worry about it, but that doesn't mean you can't celebrate with us simply to share our excitement. If you care about us, the things that make us happy should make you happy for us.
Acting Like You're Still In A Frat
"How much you can drink. Just makes you look like an idiot." —shavedchickens / Reddit
This is not a life skill. It doesn't make us feel safer. It just means you've had a lot of practice and were probably once in a frat. Grow up and get good at something valuable.
Refusing To Do Basic Chores
"Not knowing or refusing to do/learn basic life skills like cleaning, cooking, doing laundry, grocery shopping, being financially responsible, etc. I am not your mother!" —bookandmusical_lover / Reddit
No, we're not going to do your basic chores so that you can "reward" us by showing us how appreciative you are. Instead, prove to us that you're a grown man who knows how to take care of himself, and who'll put in equal effort.
Your Height Doesn't Mean Anything
"Flexing your height, especially when there's some delusion involved." —drums00000 / Reddit
It's not like the taller you are, the more it reflects something positive about you. If we're attracted to you, we already have our own eyes and can tell how tall you are. This isn't even in the top five of our requirements.
When You Try To Prove Your Dominance
"Men who interrupt you to talk about themselves, and men who touch your back or neck to physically direct you along as you're walking. You’re not coming off as charming and interesting if you don’t care about what I have to say, and if you’re treating me like I’m a wayward pet or farm animal, you're coming off as controlling and suggesting you don’t see me as an equal." —remoteblips / Reddit
We couldn't have said it better ourselves.
Telling A Woman What Women Like And Don't Like
"My last boyfriend tried to tell me how women don't find Monty Python funny. So I recited some of my favorite lines from The Holy Grail, said how funny the ministry of silly walks was... Turns out he was a bit misogynistic. So I guess don't be misogynistic. That's not sexy." —Sunfrostdude / Reddit
It's like saying that women don't each have their own unique personalities and preferences.
Putting Other Women Down To Lift Us Up
"When guys say 'you're not like other girls' and stuff of that variety. Don't put other women down to compliment me. I am exactly like other girls because we're all just people. It also tends to mean they put a persona on me and then expect me to live up to it forever." —Ms_Starscream / Reddit
It's like saying that all women are bad but that this woman is the exception. Don't insult our whole gender.
Smirking In Every Picture
"Having a straight or even wannabe-badass face on every picture. Smiling is attractive!" —kvldravji / Reddit
It's not like smiling shows weakness. It simply shows that you're happy around us. When you look back at the pictures, we don't want our kids to think you were miserable the whole time.
Jumping To Wild Conclusions
"I knew this one guy in college who would make wild assumptions about women off of a small comment of theirs, probably with good intentions to connect with them and show he's paying attention, but they would never be right and it put all of us off immediately." —saminfullcolor / Reddit
If you're listening, actually listen. Don't pick and chose when it's convenient then base the rest off of assumptions. There's more to us than that.
Turning Every Conversation To Something Sexual
"Talking about sex...every guy on dating apps turns the conversation sexual... Ask me about my day, not my knickers!" —Dragonborn959 / Reddit
Let it happen naturally. Prove to us that you're into us for the right reasons and not just trying to get in our pants.
