Let’s make one thing clear: a partner can be toxic in very different ways. Sometimes the match with a certain kind of person is, in itself, toxic, such as when two people bring out the worst in each other. Other times, circumstance and experience give a person toxic coping strategies.
However, there are also those who belong to not only one of these types, but several of them at once. Stay away from them, for your own good.
The One With A Drinking Problem
Drinking is often a learned coping mechanism. No one is born an alcoholic. It is often a projection of deep damage and even a cry for help.
Someone with a drinking problem is at the point where they need to do a lot of growth and healing, and they are probably not ready for a relationship yet.
The Helicopter Controlling One
You’ve probably heard of helicopter parents, but have you heard of helicopter partners? They’re the ones who won’t stop texting you the second you’re out of their sight to see where you are, who you’re with, and when you’ll be back.
They need to monitor your every step and even have something to say about it, like how they don’t feel comfortable with you wearing that short skirt.
The Always Jealous One
Jealousy is often a form of insecurity and paranoia. Paranoid people always think someone is out to get them or that their partner is cheating on them.
They will blame you for things you didn’t do, jump to conclusions, and make connections that aren’t there. You’ll always feel like you need to defend yourself.
Do we really need to say more? This self-absorbed partner will never put you first. To them, love is a game that they need to win.
They will tell you what you want to hear but have no problem turning on you when you stop feeding their ego. They’ll always love themselves more.
The Codependent One
This is the kind of partner who will leave you feeling drained. It’s like having a child that you never gave birth to.
They won’t know how to function if you’re not always taking care of them, cooking for them, doing their laundry, and reminding them of their doctor appointments. But they won’t do the same for you.
You don’t want to spend your life with a partner who consistently tells you that you are wrong and that they are right. They often have a need to feel superior. They have an opinion on everything, even when they have never experienced it.
They will invalidate your feelings and think they always know what’s best for you, even better than yourself.
The Lazy One
They always will postpone to tomorrow. They lack the drive, ambition, and motivation to do literally anything. You’ll constantly feel frustrated with them for not taking two minutes to wash their dish and for always opting to stay home and watch movies rather than take you up on your fun date ideas.
Life will get stale very fast.
The One Lacking Confidence
An insecure partner will subconsciously try to use you to validate themselves. They don’t know how to feel good about themselves. Rather than look for it themselves, they’ll always need your approval.
You’ll quickly learn that if they can’t be happy with themselves, they’ll never truly be happy with you either.
The Constant Critic
They always try to point out your imperfections and change you. Nothing you ever do will be good enough for them.
You’ll end up doubting yourself and even trying to mold yourself to attain their unrealistic standards.
The One Always Chasing Change
The grass always seems greener on the other side for this one. They have no idea what they actually want, so they want to try it all. They’ll never truly be happy until they figure it out.
They’ll continue to try to fill some kind of void and look for it in all the wrong places while expecting you to come along for the ride.
The One Who Doesn’t Understand Communication
They hear you, but they don’t listen. You feel like you have the same conversations over and over, but nothing changes. This is the kind of partner you get stuck in a toxic cycle with.
To even get them to sit down for a conversation rather than continually avoiding it is a challenge on its own.
The Chronic Liar
Chronic liars will get themselves stuck in such a chain of lies that they sometimes can’t even tell reality from their lies anymore. They lie because it’s the easy way out and because their overconfidence makes them believe that they won’t get caught.
It’s so easy for them that it becomes second nature.
The One With A History Of Cheating
While people are capable of change, it’s always safer to assume that once a cheater, always a cheater.
In a lot of cases, cheaters lack self-esteem and need the attention of others to validate themselves, like the validation they get from their partners isn’t enough.
The One Who Manipulates To Get What They Want
This is one of the most dangerous partners on this list. They know what you want to hear and will feed it to you without substance.
When you catch on and confront them, they turn the tables on you and make you feel like the crazy one. They are good at what they do and are looking out for themselves.
The One Who Loves The Thrill Of Living Life On The Edge
Have you ever wondered why they’re so adventurous, spontaneous, and love the thrill? It’s not because they’re brave and full of life. It’s because they’re not happy and are desperately trying to feel something.
Except, the things that they chase only bring them temporary happiness, so they’re always on to the next one. This applies to how they’ll treat your relationship, too.
The One Who’s Borderline Obsessed With You
We all want to feel adored and like the center of their world, but there are limits. You don’t want to be someone’s whole world—that’s a lot of pressure.
If you’re the only source of their happiness, they’ll associate every downfall, every hardship, and every obstacle with you, and never actually take accountability.
The One With One Foot In And One Foot Out
They’re living in a constant state of fear. They can’t deal with the unknown. They can’t fulfill your needs until they have both feet in.
This causes them to be moody and give you just enough to keep you, but not enough to make you feel secure in the relationship and your future.
The One Who Never Accepts Responsibility
Deflect, deflect, deflect, that is their motto. They have a way of putting the blame on anyone and anything, as long as it’s not themselves. They refuse to apologize or be the bigger person, even when you point out their mistakes.
They don’t acknowledge your feelings, and they make you feel like you’re the problem for having them.
The One Who Always Plays The Victim
Everything feels like the end of the world to them. They think that the whole world is against them and out to get them.
Yet they refuse to do anything about it except complain to you and get upset with you if you try to give them advice instead of feeling bad for them. They would love a pity party over a reality check.
This kind of partner may be hardworking, but they often don’t understand how to prioritize. Like any addiction, too much of anything is never a good thing.
They’ll use work as an escape to avoid facing any issues or feelings of guilt or anxiety they have at home. It’s a distraction that will always make you feel like you come second.