Signs You’re Not Really In Love With Him Even If You Think You Are
Feelings are a difficult thing to navigate, even the good ones. When you've started seeing someone and it feels like love, that's really exciting, but feeling like love doesn't mean that it is actually love.
There are some things you can look out for and consider to try and help understand what your true feelings might be.
You Don't Care About Their Drama
Everyone has something going on in their life that's a little bit crazy, whether it be their working life, friends, family, or a crazy ex.
In the beginning, you were hanging on to their every word, but now you just don't really care.
It's Normal For You To Zone Out
When they're talking to you, especially if it's just the two of you, you tend to zone out and listen but not really hear.
This is just another way you deal with having lost interest.
You Never Thought About A Future
You don't need to see a future right away with someone, but if you've been together for a while and you still don't see this person as potentially serious material, you might be wasting both your time.
You should at least have some kind of hope of a future with someone if you're going to have a healthy relationship.
You're Happiest On Your Own
Everyone loves alone time. There is no question about that.
However, when you're dating someone and you still prefer being on your own all the time and never really want to see your partner, that's a bad sign.
You Can Go A Few Days At A Time Without Talking
Most people like being able to check in with their partner at least once or twice a day if they can, but if life gets busy, it isn't that big of a deal.
What is a big deal is if a few days go by and you don't talk and you don't really notice.
You Don't Share Things About Your Life
One of the most important things about being with someone is the fact that you're going to learn how to share a life with one another, and that means being open with each other.
If you don't want to share, it probably isn't love.
They're Not A Priority
If the person you're dating isn't a priority, that's a pretty big red flag.
They don't need to be the only defining thing in your life, but they certainly should be something you take into consideration when you're making life plans.
Your Relationship Is Moving At A Snails Pace
There is nothing wrong with taking things slow as long as they are actually moving along.
Being stuck in one place with no promise of a future isn't going to be good.
You're Not Interested In Introducing Him To Family
Again, you don't need to rush things, but check in with yourself and consider if you actually do want this person to meet with your family and your friends.
If not, ask yourself why that is.
You Walk Out Of Fights
Fighting is never fun. No one likes to do it. That's why, at first, it might make sense that you're not likely to actually stick around for a fight.
There is a big difference, though, between wanting to fight right and not acknowledging fights at all.
You Think About Cheating
Everyone has fantasies, that's just human nature. That being said, having a fantasy is not the same actually making plans in your head about potentially cheating on your partner.
People who cheat don't love the person they are with.
Being Around Them Makes You Anxious
Pay attention to how you feel deep down when they are around you.
Do you feel peaceful? Calm? Taken care of and loved? Or do you feel stressed out, anxious, and like you can't wait to get home?
You're Forcing Them To Change
You should never start dating a person thinking that they're going to change or that you can change them for the better.
If that's going through your head, then it's probably a good idea to just move on now.
You Don't Touch Each Other A Lot
Physical touch is one of the things that separates an intimate relationship from a friendship.
No one is asking you to be the king and queen of PDA, but if you don't sneak a little touch here and there, it could be because you're not feeling connected to them.
You Find Them More Annoying Than Anything
No one is perfect, and no matter who you date, there are going to be things that rub you the wrong way.
If you're finding them annoying more often than not, though, you might just think they're annoying.
You Complain About Them A Lot
Your friends are probably sick of hearing it, but it doesn't stop you.
Your friends are there to listen to you, but you should hope to be in a relationship that is going to give you a lot of funny and heartwarming stories to share, too, not just compliments.
You Feel Relieved When They Cancel Plans
They send you a text and it says that they're really sorry, they have to reschedule, and you get butterflies. That's not a great sign at all, is it?
You should get butterflies when they want to make plans, not when they cancel.
You Haven't Deleted Your Dating Apps
If the relationship is new, you don't have to be in a huge rush to make things exclusive.
However, if you think that you might be in love with them but you can't part with your dating apps, is that really love? Or just a fling?
You Don't Really Think About Them During The Day
Even the relationships that have been together for the longest still have the people in the couple thinking about each other throughout the day.
Does your significant other ever cross your mind?
You're Picking Fights Over Little Things
Maybe you're picking fights because you are hoping that one of them is going to get big enough that you might break up over it.
Fighting all the time about little things is not healthy or supportive in a relationship.
When You Say "I Love You," It Feels Forced
Saying "I love you" is never an easy thing to do, and it takes guts.
But if you feel like you're struggling to get the words and you're not nervous in an excited way, should you be saying the words?
You're Constantly Focused On Their Flaws
No one is perfect, not even you, and we know this going into a new relationship with someone.
What isn't right is when you can only focus on someone's flaws, and in your mind, they have way more flaws than things you like.
You Don't Care About Sharing Experiences With Them
When you're dating someone, you should want to experience new things with them or share the things you love with one another.
If you find yourself making plans to try new things and go new places and don't even think about inviting your partner, is that a good sign?
You Keep A Lot Of Secrets From Them
Everyone is allowed to have their secrets. It's OK to not want to share everything with the person you're dating.
You should want to share most things, though. That's one of the great things about being in a relationship, and if that isn't there for you, it probably isn't love.
You Don't Notice If You Don't Hear From Them
If you go a few hours and don't notice you hear from your partner, that's no big deal, you both have lives.
If you go a few days without knowing that you haven't talked to your partner, do they really have that much of an impact on your life?
You Don't Get Jealous
Being jealous isn't always a bad thing. Sometimes, a little bit of jealously is OK in a relationship and is proof that you want to hold on to what you have.
That's why, if you see someone flirting with your man and don't feel mad about it, you're probably fine if he leaves.
You Actually Don't Know That Much About Him
At the end of the day, the person you're with should be on your mind from time to time, even if it is just in little ways.
If you're finding that you don't think about him when you're making plans for the week or you don't wonder what he's up to, that's no good.
You Don't Really Know What It Is About Them You Like
When you really stop to think about it, can you make a list of things about your partner that you find attractive?
Or is your partner someone who is just kind of there filling dead space?
You Only Have Surface-Level Conversations
Not every conversation has to be incredibly deep, but most of us strive to be able to have those conversations with the person we are dating.
Are you having good life chats with the person you're seeing? Do you care to?
You're Always Trying To Convince Others He's The One
Do you find yourself constantly trying to convince your friends and family that you should be dating this person?
Are you sure that the person you're trying to convince isn't really yourself?
