Cheating is something that most people would agree is one of the hardest things to deal with if it happens in your relationship. Do you give the person a second chance? Do you cut them off completely, end of story? Do you exact your revenge and get back at your partner for cheating on you?
While many people would say cheating is inexcusable, it doesn’t mean they’re not curious about the reason behind it. These men are sharing the reasons that they cheated in a relationship.
A Connection Abroad
“I was seeing someone for around 2 years. Then I went on a study abroad program and met someone else and really had a connection. I suppose technically I didn’t cheat since we didn’t have sex, but we fooled around a bit and I certainly cheated emotionally and betrayed my relationship.
“I suppose at the time I justified my actions. I wasn’t completely happy in my current relationship. The distance as well as the excitement of a new burgeoning relationship made me examine what I was missing. When I returned I ended up confessing what happened and ending the relationship.” —Reddit / JackEsq
A Regret That Could Have Been Avoided
“Due to low self-esteem, I thrived off attention, so rather than saying ‘no thank you, I have a girlfriend,’ I’d let things continue.
“But at the same time, I also craved stability, so never wanted to break things off with said girlfriend. There’s nothing I regret more than hurting my ex like I did.” —Reddit / eddcunningham
“I Wasn’t Too Bad At It”
“Cheating is one of the greatest adrenaline rushes one could ever have. I cheated often, and I wasn’t too bad at it.
“It all comes down to ego. You even begin to enjoy the lies.” —Reddit / derpajerp
“I Was Drunk” Isn’t A Solid Excuse
“I was having second thoughts in the relationship. I was about to break up with her, or at least present my confusion to her and take some time to think about it. So, using my oh-so-superior judgment, this allowed me to make out with another girl when I got wasted. I thought to myself ‘Well, if you’re not really into it anyway, then this doesn’t mean anything.’ I can’t tell you how much I regret it. I didn’t just lose the woman I loved, I lost a close friend and violated her trust.
“IF YOU ARE READING THIS, DO NOT CHEAT. I REPEAT, DO NOT CHEAT. NO. DO NOT. CHEAT.” —Reddit / mydogsnameisrocky
The Cheating Trifecta
“As a man who has cheated, been cheated on, and caught with intent to cheat.
“I must say cheating sucks, often occurs when a man has too much time in his hands, it is a mix of lust and a hell of a lot of greed. One that can often ruin one’s image and sense of integrity.” —Reddit / All_In_Glory
The Other Man
“I’ve never cheated but I’ve been the one a girl cheated with against their SO. It’s not a thought process like ‘haha screw that other guy!’ Or any malicious intent behind the fact.
“It’s a moment where your brain is completely overwhelmed with physical and emotional desire/attraction that completely mutes all rational thought and you just start to react, if alcohol/drugs are involved, this effect is amplified. It’s not until after the act that you realize what’s happened and the gravity of what you’ve done sinks in.” —Reddit / Locem
A Selfish Decision In The Moment
Unfortunately, this seemed to be a common theme in the answers when men were asked “why did you cheat?”
Some people do things just because they can, and they keep doing them until it catches up to them.
More Like Wrong Place, Wrong Time
“The woman I ‘cheated’ with was simply attractive, paying attention to me, and willing. I wish there were more to it than that, but there isn’t.
“It was simply a case of right place, right time (so to speak).” —Reddit / kioga86
“What’s The Downside?”
“I cheated a lot when I was younger because I kept getting away with it. It was a case of having my cake and eating it, too.
“The blame falls on me, don’t get me wrong, but since the women I was with never broke up with me, I was like, ‘Well, why wouldn’t I cheat? What’s the downside?'” — Reddit
You Can’t Have It Both Ways
“Because I wanted to sleep with other women while having the stability and partnership my relationship offered me.
“I wanted my cake and to eat it, too. I was selfish.” —Reddit
“Because she cheated on me with a very close friend and I wanted revenge. A piece of advice, revenge is the worst reason.” —Reddit / chas11man
It’s going to be pretty difficult to ever find a completely valid reason to cheat on someone.
“We Were On A Break!!”
“Got in a huge argument with an ex… thought it was over. Went out that night with the boys and hot girl was all over me. Took her home and spent all night plus the next day with her.
“Actually broke up with the ex about 2 weeks after that.” —Reddit / sincityhunter
You Could Have Broken Up Before It Happened
“The relationship I was in was already over, we just weren’t admitting it to ourselves. We broke up formally the next week anyway.” —Reddit / jlchimera
If you both knew the relationship was over, why not end it before doing anything with someone else? Then you wouldn’t be a cheater…
An Immature Decision
“Stupid, young, immature. Didn’t care about anybody but myself.
“Unless both parties have agreed on some type of open relationship, if you’re not happy in a relationship and your not getting all your needs met. Speak up, if nothing changes then leave. That’s my opinion, nonnegotiable.” —Reddit / rythmryders
Does Telling Your Partner Help Or Hurt Them?
“I was drunk and it just happened. It was very unlikely she would have found out without me confessing. It made me realize I didn’t care about her anymore. I broke up with her very soon after. I never told her as I couldn’t think of any good that would come of it, other than clearing my own conscience.
“I was always the type of person who was disgusted by cheaters up till that point. I feel more jaded with the world ever since.” —Reddit
If The Relationship Is Good, You Won’t Have The Urge
“Was fed up with the relationship I was in. Over the span of a couple of months, we started fighting over stupid things and more frequently. I was out with a couple of friends and saw a girl I had a crush on for years, and one thing led to another…
“Did make me realize the current relationship I was in wasn’t right for me, so the next week I came clean to her and I broke up with her. If you have a good relationship, you don’t even have the urge to cheat.” —Reddit / myraxus