Signs That He Doesn’t Respect Your Boundaries
No relationship is going to be perfect, but if you’re in the right relationship, it’s going to feel pretty darn close to perfect. Relationships take work, but the key is that both partners have to be willing to put in the work.
You should be equals in your relationship, and you shouldn’t feel like your partner is constantly ignoring your feelings or pushing you to do things you don’t want to do. Boundaries are there for a reason, and that reason is not to be broken.
He Disregards Your Feelings
If you explain to your partner that something they said or did made you upset, they should acknowledge your feelings and be willing to talk about it. What they shouldn’t do is brush your feelings aside or downplay them.
He Never Apologizes First
Even if he knows that he’s in the wrong or that he said something he shouldn’t have, he’s never going to admit that, and he expects you to be the one to apologize first.
He Doesn’t Take No For An Answer
“No” is a complete sentence. In any situation, if someone tells you “no,” that is not an invitation to push the limit and see if you can convince the person to change their answer. If you say no to something, that should be the end of the conversation.
He Doesn’t Take Into Account What You’re Interested In
He plans dates that he wants to go on, chooses restaurants that he wants to eat at, and always insists on watching TV shows that you don’t enjoy. It doesn’t seem like much, but it all adds up to him not taking into account what you want.
He Doesn’t Give You Space
No two people need to spend every waking hour of every day together, no matter how much they like each other. You asking for a Saturday afternoon to yourself is perfectly reasonable and shouldn’t lead to an argument or him just showing up anyways.
He Does Things Even After You’ve Told Him To Stop
You’re uncomfortable when he makes jokes about you in front of his friends, and you’ve told him that, yet he continues to do it. He also continues to flirt with other women because he’s “just a naturally friendly guy!” even though you’ve explained that it makes you uncomfortable.
He Asks For Forgiveness Rather Than Permission
He believes that in any situation, it is better to do what he wants and deal with the consequences afterward, rather than assess the situation in the first place and determine what the right thing to do would be.
He Tries To Guilt You Into Things You Don’t Want To Do
You want to like the things that your partner likes, and it’s nice that he wants to share experiences with you, but if you’re not interested in doing something, he has to respect that. Be open to trying new things, but know your limits and don’t feel obligated to do something simply because he’s upset that you won’t.
He Immediately Shuts Down Statements He Doesn’t Agree With
He’s allowed to talk about whatever he wants and bring up any conversation even if you’ve said it’s not something you want to talk about but if he’s not interested in something, that’s the end of the discussion.
He Gaslights You
You’re out for drinks with your friends and you know you’ve had enough, so when he offers you a shot, you turn it down. But now he’s calling you boring in front of everyone and claiming you never have any fun, so what happens? You feel like you have to take the drink in order to make him happy.
He Says Things Just To Get A Reaction Out Of You
Your partner shouldn’t be trying to rile you up all the time. Whether it’s in the midst of an argument or out of the blue, your partner shouldn’t be making statements in an attempt to upset you or make you angry.
He Tries To Get Out Of Events Like Family Gatherings
And the excuses he comes up with aren’t even close to fully thought out. If there’s an event that he doesn’t want to go to, regardless of how important it is to you, he’s not going to go.
He doesn’t try to come up with a valid reason, either, unless you count “I’d rather just stay home and relax” as a good enough reason to skip your parents’ anniversary dinner.
He Considers Himself A Rule-Breaker
He’s the kind of person who thinks that rules are more like suggestions or guidelines rather than actual rules. Even if it doesn’t directly affect you right now, if he’s willing to break rules in his own life, it’ll eventually seep over into yours.
He Plans Things Without Consulting You
Spontaneous romantic outings or weekend getaways are nice in theory, and every once in a while, it’s nice to surprise your partner, but he can’t be the one who dictates your entire schedule.
Constantly planning dates or booking spontaneous trips and then expecting you to make your schedule work around it gets old pretty fast.
There Were Some “Miscommunications” At The Beginning Of Your Relationship About What You Were To Each Other
You were a few months into dating, you thought he was your boyfriend and then found out he was still seeing other people, but he claimed that you never had the exclusivity talk… Don’t fall for that. Don’t be in a relationship with someone who started off trying to take a loophole.
He Pursued You While You Were In A Relationship
How a relationship starts is an indicator of how it will go on. Don’t fool yourself into thinking he’s going to change. Persistence is a great quality to have, and while we all love to feel wanted, there’s a line.
If he was willing to push the boundaries of your relationship before you were even together, he’ll continue to do it when you are.
He Always Gets The Final Say
Relationships are about compromise. We all know this, so why are you letting him be the one who always gets the final say? It may not seem like a huge deal, but he shouldn’t be the only one who gets to decide what restaurant you go to.
He Expects You To Reciprocate His Feelings, At His Same Pace
Everyone progresses in relationships at their own pace, and even when a relationship is going great, it still takes time before you want to share your feelings. If he’s making grand declarations of his love and you’re not ready for that, he shouldn’t be getting mad at you for not immediately reciprocating.
He Has An Excuse For All Of His Bad Behavior
No matter what he’s done or what he’s said, there’s always a reason for it. He’s always ready to explain exactly why he did what he did, and even if that reasoning makes no sense or doesn’t actually justify anything, he expects you to accept it.
He Makes Fun Of Your Choices
If there is ever an opportunity to mock you or tell you “I told you so” after something doesn’t turn out how you were expecting, he always takes it.
There’s no situation where he doesn’t feel like he has the right to comment on your choices or decisions, but he’d get upset if you were to treat him the same way.