Old-Fashioned Dating Rules You Can Throw Out The Window
From always acting super ladylike to the man having to do all the work, dating back then just seemed very limiting and unfair! Although this style of dating has shaped the way that dating is now, some of it just needs to be forgotten altogether.
A Lady Has To Wait For The Man To Ask Her Out
Gender roles played a much bigger part in shaping how people perceived dating back then. The man, as the dominant personality, had to be the one to make the first move. Otherwise, the passive woman might come off as too desperate or even worse...too intimidating.
It's Just Rude To Book Two Dates Back-To-Back
Although this would require some extra maneuvering, it is no longer a rule anyone should care about. If you're single and want to double-up your odds by meeting two people back-to-back, then more power to you. That way, if the first one sucks, there's still hope, and if it's great, you'll leave them wanting more!
Remember To Act Coy And Not Give Too Much Away
If you've seen a black-and-white movie, then you know what I mean. The woman bats her eyelashes, a man comes over, and she gives him a coy little smile.
This happened often at dances where the women and men would hang out separately and the women would try to seduce the men with little glances until one finally came over. Talk about patience.
It's Up To Your Date To Take Care Of All The Planning
Not only might they plan a date that you have zero interest in and now have to sit through, but they might also just suck at planning, and there's nothing that you can do about it.
This also doesn't seem like it's very helpful in finding common interests and practicing compromise.
A Gentleman Always Covers The Bill
In an age when we're fighting for equality and equal pay, it seems unfair to then always expect the man to pay for the bill when women are just as capable. Taking turns, or at least offering to split the bill, is generally a better way to go about it.
Your Date Needs To Pick You Up At Home
In the past, women would eagerly wait at home ready to come down the stairs when their date arrived to take them from their father and promise to bring them home before curfew.
Now it's probably not the best idea to let your Tinder date know where you live before you've even met. They say it's safest to meet at a pre-designated public area.
The Good Old "Three-Day Rule"
The concept that you have to wait three days before calling (after a date or getting someone's number) does not work in the 21st century. In the past, it used to signal that you were too eager, desperate, or needy.
Now, if you take three days, they're just going to assume you're not interested and move on to the next person in the sea of options of online dating.
In The 1970s, You Could Put An Ad In the Newspaper Seeking A Partner
Thanks to Tinder, your profile is the only ad you need. Newspaper ads seeking love are considered either creepy or desperate by today's standards. However, in the 1970s, people were shifting from arranged love to seeking it out.
Personal ads in newspapers became an increasingly popular way of approaching dating. Usually, women spoke of their physical attributes while men described their occupation.
No Kissing On The First Date
If you wanted to look like "wife material," then you weren't supposed to cave into kissing on the first date. Otherwise, you risked coming off as "promiscuous."
Today, a first kiss is considered important and has no timeline. Many say it can make or break an attraction, so they prefer to get it over with from the get-go.
You Must Hold Out On Getting Intimate
At first, you were expected to save yourself for marriage. Then you had to wait for at least three dates so you're not seen as being "too easy."
Now, it shouldn't matter how and when you chose to get intimate, as long as you're comfortable with it.
The Man Must Walk On The Side of The Sidewalk Nearest To The Street
This was a way for the man to act as the savior and protector in the sense that if a car was about to hit, it would mean that it would hit them first and that would somehow save the woman.
Use Three Dates To Make A Decision
Back in the courtship days, you had to go on three dates, and then by the third you had to make a decision on whether you were going to proceed (usually with the intention of marriage) or try someone new. Now, if you don't like them on the first date, you can just say bye!
Flattery Is The Way To A Woman's Heart
What we now think are cheesy pick-up lines were once essential in 1950s dating. Since courtship was mainly about a man's pursuit, he needed a strong opening line to win a woman over.
The line was meant to be over the top but flattering, and the woman was supposed to respond modestly.
Better To Avoid Serious Topics On A Date
It was not advised to talk about anything serious during dates back in the day. This seems ridiculous today, because how are you meant to know if your ideologies, values, and perspectives will match or clash if you can't talk about them?
Meeting The Parents Came First
You know how today, you only introduce each other to the parents if things are getting serious? It used to be the other way around, as the parents' approval was crucial, and dates would usually be picked up from their home.
You Should Date Someone Of Your Same Socio-Economic Rank
There is used to be an unspoken rule that if you were middle class, you were meant to marry someone else middle class, and if you were wealthy, you had to marry someone who would provide the same lifestyle. It all sounds very unromantic.
Only Date For Marriage
Dating used to have one goal and one goal only: marriage. You couldn't date for fun or to see where it goes. That's a lot of pressure. Today, you shouldn't have to know whether you're ready for marriage in that moment. As long as you and your partner are on the same page and always honest with one another.
A Woman Always Has To Be Smaller Than Her Man
You would never see a woman walking around with a shorter man back then. That would just diminish his dominance and masculinity. Now, it shouldn't matter what they look like if you're attracted to them. Plus, it's not all about looks, anyway.
Play Hard To Get
This used to be a tactic used to make a woman feel more in control.
"It was taught as a way to allow the 'pursuer' to do all of the work to initiate and maintain the relationship. But, in all actuality, it results in the woman being inauthentic and misrepresentative of her true feelings and, most importantly, wasting her time," says licensed psychologist Dr. Eliza Belle.
The Date Has To Show Up With Flowers
You know, I wouldn't be so opposed to this one. I mean they don't NEED to show up with flowers, it's not a rule, but those little chivalrous acts are also missed sometimes.
As great as the progress that we've made in dating is, it doesn't mean we can't pick the few good things about dating back in the day and keep those, too.
