Jokes That Perfectly Sum Up The Delightful Agony Of Having A Crush
People sometimes act like crushes are restricted to the playground and high school halls, but I am here to say that crushes have no age limit. I spend at least 50% of my waking hours thinking about my crush and have no idea what I would do with my time if a wasn't obsessed over our fictional love story.
Having a crush is an emotional roller coaster that we're all too willing to line up for. Here are some hilariously relatable jokes about what it's like to have a crush.
A Sad Reality On My Part
![staring photo of dobby captioned: me staring at my crush across the bar](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Screen-Shot-2019-12-19-at-2.14.30-PM-88491.jpg)
I'll be posted up at the bar, thinking that I'm giving sultry eyes to my crush across the crowd when in reality, he's wondering why a literal gremlin is staring at him.
Can I Get "Crush Leave" From Work?
![how HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WORK OR CONCENTRATE ON ANYTHING WHEN MY CRUSH IS OUT THERE AND COULD TEXT ME ANY SECOND](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-61713.jpg)
I'm ashamed to admit that I spent way too much of my time waiting around and hoping that my crush will text me, and actually put off making plans in case he later asks if I want to go out. I am so tragic.
The Universe Hates You
![sees every crush me: I'm just going to run to the corner store in my pajamas. I doubt I'll see anyone I know. Me: runs into every girl I've ever had a crush on](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/sees-every-crush-69091.jpg)
On the days I have my makeup done perfectly, my hair looking good, and a killer outfit, I don't see anyone I know. Then I go out looking like a piece of trash for 20 minutes and see everyone.
New Stalking Material
![new photo person staring lovingly at photo frame captioned: when your crush posts a new photo](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-85530.jpg)
You know it's going to be the first thing to show up on the timeline too, because I clearly stalk him way too much and the algorithm knows I'm thirsty.
How Dare You Disrupt My Personal Fantasy
![crush on bus [sees my bus-crush in street life holding hands with a dude] Wow you never mentioned you had a boyfriend in months of me silently staring at you](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/crush-on-bus-40429.jpg)
It's kind of like when your celebrity crush gets into a relationship and you feel upset. I mean, I know we would never actually be together, but it was fun to think about.
Acting On My Feelings? Couldn't Be Me
![have a good night person is being flirted with by crush but doesnt act on it](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/have-a-good-night-60316.jpg)
I am such a nervous wreck who's terrified of rejection that my crush could literally ask me to marry him and I'd still be like, "I don't think he was talking to me! I have to play it cool!"
Even If I Do Make The Move, I Accidentally Play Myself
![How to relate I'll never forget about the time I convinced a crush to hang out in my hotel room to watch netflix and then the moment I opened my browser, I forgot I had a tab open with the title](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-2-70512.jpg)
Even if I did work up the confidence to ask my crush to hangout, I probably would expose myself as a nervous loser who has stalked their Facebook and Instagram pages too many times.
I Have A Crush For Every Location
![gym crush me waiting to see if my gym crush is watching before starting my set](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Screen-Shot-2019-12-19-at-3.15.38-PM-49574.jpg)
Is it juvenile that I'll wait until my gym crush is nearby behind me before I start my set of squats so I know he sees how good I look in those leggings? Maybe. Will I stop doing it? Nope.
Everyone Should Be Legally Obligated To Answer This Question On Demand
![like this to everyone](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-3-46039.jpg)
There's nothing like trying to discern whether your crush is giving you signs that they're into you or if your crazy brain is taking average actions and blowing them out of proportion because you're smitten.
Time To Break My Own Heart! Hehe
![doesn't like me me: he obviously doesn't like me. I need to get over him. Inner me: keep imagining cute scenarios with him and make yourself fall in love](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Screen-Shot-2019-12-19-at-3.26.18-PM-10279.jpg)
He's not interested in being a relationship with me and we'll never be together? I'm still going to think about him nonstop and develop a storyline in which we work out, making reality a nightmare where none of my dreams come true!
I'm Normally Not This Clumsy, I Swear
![act normal person jokes that they turn into a clumsy mess around their crush](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Screen-Shot-2019-12-19-at-2.14.15-PM-10551.jpg)
The worst part is that I'm so composed and cool when I'm around guys that I don't care about, but the second my crush walks into the room I become an absolute loser idiot.
While I Have Many Crushes, None Really Last
![cannot stay interested 12 year old me really made my life plan and thought I'd be engaged by 21...we'll we are a little over a month away and I cannot stay interested in a dude for more than two weeks](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-1-64490.jpg)
It'll only have been a few days of one crush when a new cute barista will start working at my favorite coffee shop and the original crush will get dropped from the roster.
I Love To Jump To Conclusions
![jumping to conclusion Person jokes that their crush is in love with every girl you see](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-4-33216.jpg)
Rationally, I know that I talk to people and like photos on Instagram all the time without being in love with them, but if my crush so much as glances at another girl, he is definitely about to propose to her.
I'm Non-Stop Screaming On The Inside
![when they talk to me me on the inside when my crush talks to me (photo of excited girl screaming)](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-93222.jpg)
I'll be trying my absolute hardest to seem like I'm chill around my crush, but in reality, my heart is racing, my blood is rushing to my face, and I want to scream in joy.
Time To Put Him On A Pedestal
![soundcloud girls be like](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/soundcloud-49512.jpg)
I get that my crush is probably just a regular dude who washes his hands with Dawn dish soap on a daily basis, but in my mind, he is a unique, beautiful soul.
Your Interests Are My Interests Now
![vegan person pretends to want to be vegan for crush](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Screen-Shot-2019-12-30-at-3.45.47-PM-68456.jpg)
I once had a really intense crush on a guy who always wore a t-shirt with a band name on it, so I spent four hours listening to every song they ever recorded so I could talk to him about them.
Crushes Are Forever
![unhealthy The guy that I had an unhealthy obsessive crush on my entire childhood and all of my high school just Snapchat me that he's going to be in town soon without his WIFE and we should hang out, like this is some kind of bad TV movie and I would actually say yes to him](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-1-37236.jpg)
I'm not going to lie, if the Cory from my high school's basketball team who I had a crush on for my entire junior and senior years slid into my DMs, I would get very flustered.
This Is The Mantra From Now Until January 1st
![notice you your crush will notice you in 2020 (x3)](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-25784.jpg)
I know it's dumb, but I'm still going to spend every 11:11, shooting star, and waking moment of my existence wishing that my crush will notice and fall for me next year.
...Even If This Is The Sad Reality
![she's not the one she's laying in his king sized bed, watching Netflix. She see's your text. She ignores it and puts her phone on do not disturb. The characters in the show started tickling each other so he turns to her and says](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-1-60096.jpg)
It'll be midnight and I'll be lying in bed thinking about my crush with hope in my heart while he's at a girl's house falling in love with her and doing the naked tango.
I Should Probably Give Up On Crushes
![didn't even know I could still read I'm so single right now and idk what to do with all the time I usually spend thinking about my 6 boyfriends like I'm reading a book right now. I didn't even know I could still read](https://www.thisiswhyimsingle.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/Untitled-design-4-29043.jpg)
If I didn't waste so much time thinking about my crushes, I would probably be better at basic multiplication and maybe also have some interesting hobbies. But, alas, will lie on my bed and daydream about Chris instead.