We’ve all seen the romantic comedies and read the books: the pair of friends slowly begin to realize that they might actually be a bit more than friendly, the guy confesses his undying love for the heroine of the story, and the couple ends up living happily ever after.
Real life isn’t that simple, and it can be hard to tell if your best guy pal is actually harboring romantic feelings for you.
He Stops Taking About Other Women Around You
Before, he would discuss women that he was seeing or talk about women he was attracted to, but he hasn’t brought up those topics in a long time around you.
He Likes To Plan Outings For You Two
He’ll suddenly start planning outings for you two to take on together, often activities like going hiking, attending a concert, or going to a local event, when you guys used to just kind of casually hang out before.
He Shares Big News With You First
Whenever something new happens in his life or he has something to celebrate, you’re the first person he tells. You seem to know more about his life than the rest of the friends in your group.
He’s More Touchy With You
It’s little things like a hand on your back, playful touches, or simply maintaining closer proximity to you when you are together—especially if he never was touchy with you before.
He Starts Complimenting You More
Before, you felt like he noticed your appearance the same way he would see a table lamp, but he is suddenly dropping compliments on your clothes, appearance, or personality traits.
You Catch Him Stealing Glances At You
When you’re in a group setting, you’ll look up to see that he’s already looking at you. Alternatively, when something funny happens, he looks to you first to see your reaction.
He Jokes Around Less
Of course, you still joke around and have light conversations, but he has lately started delving into more serious and personal topics with you. He specifically tries to make conversations less superficial between the two of you.
He Initiates A Lot Of One-On-One Hangout Sessions
You guys tend to hang out with a group of friends, but he has gone out of his way recently to hang out just the two of you—movie nights, grabbing lunch together, etc.
His Teasing Feels Flirty
Naturally, ripping on each other and a healthy amount of banter is natural in any friendship, but lately, it has felt a little more flirtatious to you than it has in the past.
He Talks About You To His Parents
Unless you have been close friends since childhood, there is no real reason for him to tell his parents about you unless he sees you being in his life for a long time in a significant way.
He Talks About Dating/Relationship Ideals With You
He suddenly starts wanting to debate hypothetical relationship issues, asking what you look for in a relationship, or talking about what he personally wants from a relationship with you in a way that isn’t clearly him seeking advice from a “female opinion.”
He Shows Signs Of Jealousy
He gets cagey and weird when you bring up other guys that you’re talking to, or he goes out of his way to roast them. If he’s clearly acting jealous, then he probably has feelings for you.
He’s Closer To You Than Before
Due to the sheer amount of time you spend together, you’ve ended up being one of the people he is closest to in his life, but you never were really this close before.
He’s Treating You Differently
Sometimes, it’s as simple as you noticing a change in his behavior around you. Most times, if you can tell that he’s acting differently toward you, there’s a chance that his feelings have changed. Trust your intuition.
Should You Go For It?
Realizing that your guy friend has feelings for you leaves you with an important decision: should you pursue something with them romantically, or should you try to preserve your friendship instead?
Understand What It Could Mean For Your Friendship
The reality is that, once you decide to date each other, there is no way that your friendship will ever be the same as it was before. It could lead to you guys never being friends again after the breakup: are you okay with that happening?
Will It Destroy A Group Dynamic?
If you two are part of a larger friend group, would you still be able to hang out with everyone if you were to break up, or would you force your friends to pick sides?
Do You Actually Reciprocate Those Feelings?
You might love him as a friend, but that doesn’t mean that you have any sort of romantic attachment toward him. Before jumping into dating, consider if you really want to be with him or if you’re just comfortable with him.
The Friend Zone Isn’t A Real Thing
If he tries to say it’s mean for you to not want anything beyond friendship with him or says you’re “friendzoning” him, know that it’s just a tactic to bully you into pretending to reciprocate his feelings.
Be Prepared For Awkwardness
Some of the best relationships start from friendships, but there is definitely an initial adjustment period where things are going to be a little awkward while you try to figure out a new dynamic. However, when things work, they really work.