Bride Asks If She’s Wrong To Be Hurt After Her Boyfriend Casually Proposed At Home

When you think about someone proposing to you, you generally think that it's going to be pretty romantic, right? Romantic means different things to different people, though. For example, some people might want to be proposed to in a huge, busy restaurant, while others might want something more personal and intimate.

No matter what your dream proposal is, is it wrong to have those expectations?

A Woman Recently Posted On Reddit Asking These Questions

woman explaining how her boyfriend proposed in the kitchen
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12

Her boyfriend had proposed to her, and she was excited about the idea of spending her life with him, but she was disappointed about how it went down. It wasn't what she expected.

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They Had Talked About It In The Past

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woman talking about her and her fiance have talked for a long time about getting engaged.
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
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Anytime you're making a big life commitment, like marriage, it's important to talk about them at length and be open about your expectations. This couple did that, and she thought it was clear she wanted something more romantic.

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A Proposal At Home Might Be For Some, But Not For All

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woman explaining that her boyfriend proposed in the kitchen after a long day
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
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She had been expecting to be proposed to surrounded by nature after being on a hike, or at least somewhere that wasn't in her hallway next to their shoes and coats.

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She Was Obviously Upset

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woman asking if she's wrong that her boyfriend proposed that way
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
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Feeling overwhelmed with the situation, she walked away to clear her thoughts so that she didn't freak out. But now she's wondering if she's the one who is wrong—if either of them are.

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Lots Of People In The Comments Had Thoughts

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someone saying she has the right to be upset because they discussed it before hand
Photo Credit: Reddit / Rastavaray
Photo Credit: Reddit / Rastavaray
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Most people agreed that it would be one thing to be disappointed if they hadn't discussed it beforehand, but they had, and to many, that was a reason to be upset about it.

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Some People Got The Emotional Aspect Of It

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someone defending her saying that it wasn't the right time
Photo Credit: Reddit / lightwoodorchestra
Photo Credit: Reddit / lightwoodorchestra
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Because not only had it been in a way that she totally did not expect, it was after a really long day that she was ready to just put behind her.

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There Were Some Pretty Adorable Explanations

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guy saying that maybe he proposed on impulse
Photo Credit: Reddit / ruckh
Photo Credit: Reddit / ruckh
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Some people were saying that it could have just been a case of him being so excited about starting their future together that he didn't want to wait anymore before asking her.

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Others Wondered If She Expected Too Much

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someone suggesting that maybe she built it up too much in her head
Photo Credit: Reddit / redrosebeetle
Photo Credit: Reddit / redrosebeetle
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It is a fair point that she might have built it up in her head to be something very specific, but it's not like what she was asking was outrageous.

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Some Were A Little Harsher

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someone saying she made it a big deal in her head because he made it a big deal
Photo Credit: Reddit / Churros_DoleWhip
Photo Credit: Reddit / Churros_DoleWhip
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Maybe the fact that he proposed without taking her desires and expectations into consideration shows that he was being a little careless and selfish, even if his intentions were good and he was excited.

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Really, She Wasn't Asking For Anything Crazy

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someone saying she wasn't expecting anything crazy
Photo Credit: Reddit / jupitaur9
Photo Credit: Reddit / jupitaur9
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He could have easily asked her to go out for a walk and when they entered the forest he could have got down on one knee. He would have only had to wait another 20 minutes.

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Someone Thought It Was A Big Red Flag

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someone saying this could be a bigger problem
Photo Credit: Reddit / whisky_biscuit
Photo Credit: Reddit / whisky_biscuit
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The question needs to be asked if this behavior is a deal-breaker. Is it possible that this stems from a different set of problems, like him being inconsiderate and not thinking about what she wants?

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Proposals Should Be Special To Both

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someone pointing out the proposal should be special to both of them
Photo Credit: Reddit / UnicornOnTheJayneCob
Photo Credit: Reddit / UnicornOnTheJayneCob
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And in this specific instance, it was not special for both of them. We don't even know for sure how he felt about it or what was going on in his head when he asked.

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Some People Shared Proposal Stories To Try And Help Her Feel Better

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someone telling story about how their parents got engaged
Photo Credit: Reddit / Suspicious-Metal
Photo Credit: Reddit / Suspicious-Metal
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Could you imagine having to tell your friends and family that your partner proposed simply by leaving the ring out on the table? He didn't even actually ask her, just waited and assumed.

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That Sounds Like A Good Reason

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couple got engaged for
Photo Credit: Reddit / baewcoconutinmyarms
Photo Credit: Reddit / baewcoconutinmyarms
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In its own way, this is kind of cute. He's feeling out the waters to see if she is feeling marriage the same way he is after they had previously said it was something they weren't interested in.

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She Wasn't Going To Stand For It

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someone tried proposing in a parking lot and she said,
Photo Credit: Reddit / wranglearrowleaf
Photo Credit: Reddit / wranglearrowleaf
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At the time, it was probably stressful for both of them, but since everything worked out, it is kind of funny that she knew it was coming but didn't want it to go down like that.

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This Doesn't Sound Healthy

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couple get engaged while fighting
Photo Credit: Reddit / monday_next
Photo Credit: Reddit / monday_next
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It depends on what they were fighting about and how often they fight, but this seems really dramatic and like the exact opposite time to ask someone to marry you.

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People Wanted To Know Where Is Head Was At

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someone shared a story about how they did something similar and it worked out
Photo Credit: Random_User_81
Photo Credit: Random_User_81
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What was he thinking? Literally, we want to know what his thought process was. Did he really just want to surprise her so he decided to go off-book and really do the opposite?

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People Had Some Valid Reasons

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someone pointing out maybe he didn't want to lose it
Photo Credit: Reddit / MeiSuesse
Photo Credit: Reddit / MeiSuesse
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One person brought up the fact that he might have wanted to ask her sooner rather than later because he didn't want anything bad to happen to the ring or didn't want her to find it by accident.

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She Posted An Update Saying She Said Sorry

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she explains she still wants to marry him, she was just confused
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
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She said sorry for reacting the way that she did, but not for being upset. She stated that she was so happy that he asked, but she was sad that it wasn't in the way she had imagined.

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Let's Hope She Posts More Updates Later

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she said she is going to talk to him to see what happened
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
Photo Credit: Reddit / taproposal12
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She said the next thing she knows she needs to do is to talk to him about why he did what he did. There is probably a logical explanation that she's missing.