We’ve all experienced it. You’re on a date with someone or you’ve been seeing someone for a few weeks, talking back and forth, and things seem to be going well…when all of a sudden the wind shifts.
They do one simple thing, or you notice a quality about them. They might not even be aware of it—but you are—and it’s all over. You’ve got the ick, and there’s no coming back from that. It might not even be a rational thing to be upset about, but once that turnoff has made itself known, you know the end is near.
We Have No Tolerance For People Who Don’t Respect The Environment
“Littering. I knew a girl who was fairly attractive in all aspects until we were headed somewhere and she just throws trash out the window. Never understood not being able to hold onto your trash until you find somewhere.” —Reddit / ohmylulz
“Halitosis” —Reddit / LiterallyOuttoLunch
It makes sense that this would be a turnoff for a lot of people considering there’s such an easy fix for it. As long as you brush your teeth in the morning, we won’t have a problem.
“Staring At Their Phone The Entire Time.” —Reddit / OkStop
To go along with this one, another person added “always texting and never texts you back.” If you’re going to be the person who is constantly on your phone, you need to answer your texts—but also, please put your phone away. We want to see your face and know we have your full attention.
“Mouth Breathers.” —Reddit / 4apalehorse
Maybe she has a deviated septum and she’ll stop breathing if she has to close her mouth? You don’t know her story, or what the story behind her deviated septum is!! I bet she’ll tell you all about it if you ask, though.
“That ‘Nice Guys Finish Last’ Bitterness” —Reddit / RedheadAblaze
The men who claim to be constantly placed in the friend zone despite being a “nice guy” or who complain that nice guys finish last are never as nice as they perceive themselves to be.
“Excessive Bragging.” —Reddit / jinxedit
Whoever first got the idea in their head that excessively bragging about your accomplishments would make people like you more was seriously misguided, and they shouldn’t have shared that mentality with others.
You don’t need to one-up everything someone else says. Be confident in your accomplishments without needing to make others look worse.
Trying To Force A Connection Too Soon
“Being insanely clingy or trying to force a relationship right off the bat. Also, being really pushy with anything that’s physically intimate when it’s clearly making me uncomfortable. I’m not a prude, I just don’t know you well enough.” —Reddit / Happy_Happy_Joy
You Have To Be Able To Hold A Conversation
“Not giving back in the conversation. Scored a date with this attractive girl. Went out with her based on looks. Started off with the basics: where did you grow up, family, what are you studying. Etc.
“The whole date she did not really reciprocate. I would ask her a question and it would be one or two words, with no sense of trying to instigate a new conversation topic.
“Didn’t call her back.” —Reddit. / bbhatti12
Not Everything Needs To Be Documented On Social Media
“When she’s addicted to social media and feels the need to post her entire life throughout the internet.” — Reddit / Iamdiggums.
This goes hand in hand with someone who is always on their phone. Enjoy the moment you’re in and put your phone down.
“Proud Of Not Reading/Being Smart.”
It’s okay if you don’t enjoy reading, but not liking to read or not being interested in learning new things is not a personality trait—or at least isn’t one that many people find desirable.
“The Chase” Can Be Exhausting
“Making you chase them and put all the effort in while they refuse to give any back. Doesn’t matter how amazingly beautiful they are. Is not worth it. Took me a long time to realize this.” —Reddit / blandersblenders
“When She Sets Me On Fire When I’m Asleep, JENNA” —Reddit / Dinocologist
Hopefully, there aren’t a lot of people walking around lighting people on fire, but I think we can all agree that this would be a major turnoff. Sorry, Jenna, but I don’t need to know your side of the story.
“Saying It’s OK When It Clearly Isn’t.”
“Just tell me what it is you’re not OK with.” —Reddit / artboii88
It can be frustrating when something is clearly bothering someone, yet they won’t tell you what it is. Maybe they’re just not ready to share yet…
“Not Shutting Up About Past Relationships” —Reddit / 77remix
There’s a time and a place to share about your past relationship traumas, maybe even bond over them, but that time and place isn’t everywhere or anywhere. You have to move on.
“When You Laugh At, Belittle, Or Insult My Hobbies Or Interests.” —Reddit / Casual_WWE_reference
This should be common sense, but you shouldn’t be laughing at anybody’s hobbies, especially someone that you want to potentially be in a relationship with. You’re supposed to support the people you like.
Looking For That Fashionable Fit
“Not dressing fashionably. Sounds strange, but someone wearing clothes that don’t fit or just ugly clothes is a turnoff for me.” —Reddit
You don’t even need to wear clothes fit for the runway; just look like you put it a little bit of effort or actually care about your appearance.
Laziness Isn’t Something To Brag About
“Someone who boasts about their laziness as if lack of motivation is something to be proud of. I really want a partner who will drive me to do my best, and who will inspire me. Ideally, I’d do the same for her.” —Reddit / IranianGenius
Know When To Admit You’re Wrong
“Personality types who probably consider themselves ‘outspoken and opinionated.’ If someone’s not prepared to stop for a minute and consider ‘Hey, maybe I’m full of it?‘ then we’re not on the same mental plane, and I can’t tolerate their company.” —Reddit
Let Us Meet You In Public First
“Inviting you to come over to their house when it would be the first time meeting them. I don’t think dudes realize how creepy it is to us, because a majority of guys are good people. While women have been brought up walking to their cars holding their keys a certain way in case they get attacked.” —Reddit / smashreigh
Granted, some women are comfortable with it, but maybe let the girl propose where to meet the first time rather than the man choosing the place.
Take Responsibility For Your Own Mistakes
“Manipulation and the constant victim mentality. The ones that ‘have no part’ in the situations they find themselves in and allow life to ‘just happen to them.’
“They’re incapable of seeing their part, which makes it impossible for them to grow and improve. Nothing is their fault.” —Reddit / GalacticSuperDrone