Women Share Times Their Boyfriends’ Gestures Were Well-Intended, But So Awful In Execution

Sometimes in life, we think we're doing something nice for someone else, but it actually has the opposite effect on them. The intentions were pure, but the result was not quite what they wanted.

These women on Reddit came together to share the worst thing a boyfriend or husband has ever done for them while trying to be helpful or romantic.

Sometimes Surprises Aren't The Best Idea

Skaters swirl around the skating rink at Rockefeller Center
Photo Credit: Chris Hondros / Newsmakers // Story Credit: Reddit / HumbleBell
Photo Credit: Chris Hondros / Newsmakers // Story Credit: Reddit / HumbleBell

"My ex-boyfriend surprised me and took me ice skating at Rockefeller Center for Christmas once. It was a sweet idea, but he had said we were going to a show so I was not dressed warmly—I was wearing a dress, tights, and a lighter but formal jacket, with no hat, gloves, or scarf.

"I was so cold after we had been on the ice for about twenty minutes that my lips turned blue and we had to leave. The thought behind it was really cute, but it would have gone so much better if I had been dressed appropriately."

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Not Exactly A "Happy" Birthday

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An exterior view of The Auschwitz complex
Photo Credit: Scott Barbour / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / MMMFUD
Photo Credit: Scott Barbour / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / MMMFUD
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"My ex booked a surprise trip to Poland for my birthday, during which he also booked a trip to Auschwitz. Had to wake up at 6 a.m. to spend the majority of my 21st birthday at a death camp and being given a tour of gas chambers."

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"Useful" Does Not Always Mean "Good"

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collection of fitness supplements
Photo Credit: SSPL / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / wasntme100
Photo Credit: SSPL / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / wasntme100
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"My boyfriend bought me an expensive three-month supply of a diet plan which consists of shakes, pills, and patches. I was so pissed I didn't even open it. Who gives someone a diet plan for Christmas?"

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Not Her Face...

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couple walking dog
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Spencer Davis // Story Credit: Reddit / BritneyShameless
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Spencer Davis // Story Credit: Reddit / BritneyShameless
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"We were out walking our dog and strolled past some flowers. He picked one and tried to place it behind my ear... The problem was he was also holding a bag of dog poop that was hitting against my face while he tried."

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That's A Big Thing To Book Without Asking First

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view of eiffel tower over siene
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Chris Karidis // Story Credit: Reddit
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Chris Karidis // Story Credit: Reddit
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"My grandad passed away on my mum's birthday. My now-ex thought the ideal way to cheer me up was to book me a trip to Paris the following year, to commemorate the one year anniversary of his passing. I really just wanted to be with my family."

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Flowers Are A Bit Much

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flowers in glass vase
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Christie Kim // Story Credit: Reddit
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Christie Kim // Story Credit: Reddit
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"Not a boyfriend, but a guy who was interested in me (who knew I was happily dating someone else) sent me a bouquet of flowers when I was having a bad day.

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"The flowers were honestly beautiful, and my boyfriend and I got kind of a chuckle about it, but man, that was inappropriate."

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You Can't Just Guess The Size Of Shoes

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Christian Louboutin heels are seen on display
Photo Credit: TIMOTHY A. CLARY / AFP via Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / Hatcheling
Photo Credit: TIMOTHY A. CLARY / AFP via Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / Hatcheling
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"At the beginning of our relationship, he went on a trip to Rome with his family. He brought back some shoes for me, a 6'1 woman. He was so excited when he handed over those (pretty nice) size 6 slippers. It was hard to break to him that I loved them, and I loved the gesture—but I am a giant and a size 10.5."

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He Said, "We're Toxic"

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photo of poem from milk and honey
Photo Credit: Instagram / @r.a.engel // Story Credit: Reddit / porcupinesNicecream
Photo Credit: Instagram / @r.a.engel // Story Credit: Reddit / porcupinesNicecream
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"He gave me the poetry book milk and honey by Rupi Kaur and underlined the parts that applied to our relationship. Including the parts about how messed up and unhealthy it was and how we knew we needed to break up. For my birthday. He was confused when my reaction was just a lot of crying."

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That's Forever, Dude

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man tattooing arm of other man
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Julia Giacomini // Story Credit: Reddit / evebert
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Julia Giacomini // Story Credit: Reddit / evebert
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"My ex got my initials tattooed over his heart and he surprised me with it; I pretended to be flattered. We broke up a year later and I wonder if he still has that tattoo..."

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I Wouldn't Have Phrased It Like That

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victoria's Secret lingerie and womenswear store
Photo Credit: Robert Alexander / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / pipestream
Photo Credit: Robert Alexander / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / pipestream
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"We were going to attend a wedding last summer and I couldn't quite fill out the bust of my dress. My boyfriend was convinced it would help if I got myself a good bra, so he offered to get one for me.

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"We walked into the lingerie shop and the store associate asked what she can help with. I hesitated to answer, but my bf jumped in and said, 'We would like a padded bra for her because as you see, she doesn't have much chest.'"

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It's Not Romantic, But Definitely A Nice Gift

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man pouring oil into car
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Tim Mossholder // Story Credit: Reddit / madisonpreggers
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Tim Mossholder // Story Credit: Reddit / madisonpreggers
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"My husband is such a goof and sweet, but not what I'd call romantic. He’s very practical so instead of giving me Valentine’s Day presents or flowers every year, he gets the oil changed in my car and leaves a note with a Valentine’s theme (sometimes it’s a card if it’s February) that says, 'Oil is changed...love you.'

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"The first few years I was like seriously?!!! Now, I swoon since I don’t have to deal with the oil change place."

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Serenading Is Never As Romantic As You'd Think

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out of focus photo of man playing guitar
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Alf WIlliamsen // Story Credit: Reddit / FixEverythingInPost
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Alf WIlliamsen // Story Credit: Reddit / FixEverythingInPost
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"We technically weren't together, but a guy I briefly dated serenaded me by singing and playing 'Miss you' by Blink 182 and some John Mayer song I can't remember. I mega-cringed. It was our first date and our last one.

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"Kissed him just to make him shut up."

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Always Ask Her Friends First

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close up of engagement ring on finger
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Andy Holmes // Story Credit: Reddit / captainpzvious
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Andy Holmes // Story Credit: Reddit / captainpzvious
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"My now-husband originally wanted to design a horrendous-looking engagement ring with multiple stones of different colors. He thought that since I like many colors, I would like a colorful ring. However, my taste in jewelry is actually very simple and minimalistic. When he showed my friends the design, they thankfully talked him out of it."

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It Was Never About The Jacket, Pal

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man wearing large jacket
Photo Credit: Edward Berthelot / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / DecentLeftovers
Photo Credit: Edward Berthelot / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / DecentLeftovers
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"My boyfriend bought me a men's jacket for Christmas. I was so confused, I had to ask why. His response was, 'You always like wearing my jacket so much, I figured you’d want your own.'"

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Did He Not Read It First?

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A display window at a Victoria's Secret store
Photo Credit: Robert Alexander / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / blah_fkin_blah
Photo Credit: Robert Alexander / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / blah_fkin_blah
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"My husband got me some pajamas for our first Christmas as a married couple from Victoria's Secret. One of the pajama sets had a shirt that said 'single all the way' I was like hmmmmm?"

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Okay, But Why Did He Have To Say It Then??

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The waiters just before the opening of the doors at the Restaurant Louis XV at the Hotel de Paris on March 3, 2011 in Monaco.
Photo Credit: Maurice ROUGEMONT/Gamma-Rapho via Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / extraordinarilyaverage
Photo Credit: Maurice ROUGEMONT/Gamma-Rapho via Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / extraordinarilyaverage
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"He took me to a fancy restaurant and, while there, told me I could be better at sex and suggested a sex book that I read. I cried. Right there in the restaurant, I cried in my fancy dress."

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Decor Is Not His Strong Suit

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lightbox sign says
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nikita Kachanovsky // Story Credit: Reddit
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nikita Kachanovsky // Story Credit: Reddit
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"Last year for Christmas, he made me a sign that has a quote, the date of our marriage with a wedding photo, and the dates of our three children's births with frames underneath for their infant photos.

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"Cute idea, but he overestimated the space he would need because it's 3 ft tall and almost as wide. I have nowhere to actually hang it and if I'm being honest, it's kind of ugly. He put a lot of work into it which makes me feel bad."

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That's A Lot Of Tears To Collect

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tiny glass bottles
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Kelly Sikkema // Story Credit: Reddit / jaaackrabbit
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Kelly Sikkema // Story Credit: Reddit / jaaackrabbit
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"My first boyfriend gave me a wooden box with a padlock on it for Christmas one year, handed me the key, and told me not to open it until I got home. I opened it and inside was a little jar of his blood, and a little jar of his tears. I was 17 and mortified."

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The Timing Could Have Been Better

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A man walks along an ice-covered break-wall along Lake Michigan with Chicago skyline in background
Photo Credit: Scott Olson / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / cuddellie
Photo Credit: Scott Olson / Getty Images // Story Credit: Reddit / cuddellie
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"Proposed. We were visiting Chicago and had gone up to the hotel rooftop to check out the view, but it was horribly cold and windy. My sweet guy got down on one knee and screamed the big question over the howling wind. I was so cold and flustered that I basically said, 'Yeah sure—anything that’ll get you to take me back inside.'

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"We’d just had a nice, romantic visit to the Sears Tower, and looking back I have no idea why he didn’t just propose to me there."

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What A Mean Buildup For No Real Reason

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earrings in box
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Leon Seibert // Story Credit: Reddit / PItta_
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Leon Seibert // Story Credit: Reddit / PItta_
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"Last Christmas, we were with my family opening gifts, and my boyfriend INSISTED I open his gift last, making a huge deal out of it. It was ring-box shaped. I started internally freaking out, thinking he was about to propose. We had been talking about it for a while and dating about 5 years at the time, so it wasn't unexpected.

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"Open the box: earrings. They were beautiful, but dude. REALLY?! Don't give me a small jewelry box after hyping the gift up that hard if it's not a ring."