If You Do These Things, Apparently The Internet Thinks You’re A Terrible Person

The internet is a judgmental place, and this time, the holy members of Reddit have turned their judgment on each other to determine “what screams ‘I am a terrible person?’

Some of the answers had us nodding our heads in agreement, while others left us concerned that everyone in our life secretly hates us because we didn’t realize we were doing something other people considered terrible. Time to learn the tough truth about how people feel about these behaviors.

Wear Headphones Like A Normal Person

large speaker, text: Walking around a store playing music on a bluetooth speaker full blast
Photo Credit: Reddit / New_Game_P1us & Unsplash / Paul Esch-Laurent
Photo Credit: Reddit / New_Game_P1us & Unsplash / Paul Esch-Laurent

I’m thrilled that you’ve found a genre of music that makes you happy, but that doesn’t mean that every other person within a two-mile radius also wants to hear your music. The people who do this never have good taste in music, either.

The Novelty Has To Have Worn Off By Now

Parked Audi, text: Any variation of 'princess' 'queen' or 'daddy's girl' on license plates
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Dmitry Tomashek & Reddit / mc_squared_93
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Dmitry Tomashek & Reddit / mc_squared_93

It might have seemed cute or funny at the time, but can you honestly tell me that 5 years later, you’re still happy to be driving a car with a “D4DDYSgurl” license plate?

You’re Trash If You Throw Trash

papers on sidewalk, text:
Photo Credit: Unsplash & Reddit
Photo Credit: Unsplash & Reddit

The internet came to a pretty much unanimous decision that if you’re a person who litters, you’re as trashy as the garbage you just threw onto the ground. There’s no debating this one.

It’s One Space Per Vehicle

parking lot, text:
Photo Credit: Unsplash / John Matychuk & Reddit / islandowl & / bromanclature
Photo Credit: Unsplash / John Matychuk & Reddit / islandowl & / bromanclature

If you have a car that’s big enough for you to park across four parking spaces, you’ve clearly got some other issues to be dealing with in life. Taking up two spaces, though, just means you should go back to driver’s ed.

Round Up And Move On

tip jar with money inside, text: people that calculate tips to the penny
Photo Credit: Reddit / NotMyBannedAccount & Unsplash / Sam Dan Truong
Photo Credit: Reddit / NotMyBannedAccount & Unsplash / Sam Dan Truong

The people who do this are also the people who tell you that you owe them exactly 2 dollars and 17 cents for that coffee they bought you three weeks ago, rather than you just paying for theirs next time.

What’s The Common Denominator?

Men in garish suits, text:
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Mariya Georgieva & Reddit / Pippin4242
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Mariya Georgieva & Reddit / Pippin4242

Anyone who says this is a walking red flag, and you won’t convince us (or the internet) of anything else. They are the common denominator here, and they will say the same about you if and when you break up.

Just Enough Trauma To Go Viral

Child crying, text: Making your children upset in order to record it and post it for internet points
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Marcos Paulo Prado & Reddit / WiseHick
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Marcos Paulo Prado & Reddit / WiseHick

You know those videos that always circulate after Halloween or Easter where parents lie to their children and tell them that they ate all their candy or chocolate, so the kids cry? Who decided those were funny?

Old People Are Barely An Exception

long-exposure of blurry people walking down hall, text: someone walking as slow as possible in a crowded hallway where you can't get around them. The only exception is old people
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Martin Adams & Reddit / PsychoticChocolate & / enilato
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Martin Adams & Reddit / PsychoticChocolate & / enilato

You’ll still be annoyed by the older people who walk slowly down the middle of the hallway, but you’ll cut them some slack. Anyone under the age of 65, though? The worst.

We Don’t Need To Hear Your Conversation

man holding smartphone, text: having a conversation on the phone with it on speaker in public
Photo Credit: Unsplash & Reddit / Fatherofronin
Photo Credit: Unsplash & Reddit / Fatherofronin

Either find a pair of headphones or hold the phone up to your ear like a normal person. Just because you’re enjoying your conversation does not mean that the rest of us want to hear your friend tell a story about her coworker.

Have A Little Patience

traffic lights, text: honking at someone as soon as the light turns green and then dangerously cutting them off cuz they weren't moving fast enough. Is it really worth five seconds of your life to get that fed up?
Photo Credit: Unsplash & Reddit / Pandepon
Photo Credit: Unsplash & Reddit / Pandepon

I don’t know how often the dangerous cut-off part of this equation happens, but we’ve all been victim to the impatient driver behind us at a light who felt the need to honk at the exact millisecond the light changed to green.

What Kind Of Monster…

bowl of cereal with milk, text: pouring milk before cereal.
Photo Credit: Reddit / Dabombfan & Unsplash / Nyana Stoica
Photo Credit: Reddit / Dabombfan & Unsplash / Nyana Stoica

The whole idea behind pouring milk before cereal doesn’t even make sense. How do you know how much milk you’ll need until you heavy-handedly pour half the box into your bowl? Plus, it creates an unnecessary amount of splash!

They’re People Too, You Know

waiter carrying tray of drinks, text: Being rude to people in the service industry
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Kate Townsend & Reddit / distrucktocon & tomorrowistomoato
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Kate Townsend & Reddit / distrucktocon & tomorrowistomoato

A friendly reminder to anyone who feels the need to be rude to waitstaff or people who work in the service industry: you’re no better or more important than them. Chances are they know how to feed themselves, whereas you have to rely on take-out.

What’s The Point Of Having A Blinker?

Car with glowing signal light, text: changing lanes without signalling or looking
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Jesse Collins & Reddit / Xboarder84
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Jesse Collins & Reddit / Xboarder84

People need to remember that the point of a turn signal is to alert those around you of what move you’re about to make with the piece of metal you’re racing down the road. It’s not for the driver, it’s for everyone else. Use your blinker.

A Meal Shouldn’t Be An Audible Experience

man eating burger, text: making noise while chewing food
Photo Credit: Reddit / calvinNhobbes28 & Pexels / Jack Sparrow
Photo Credit: Reddit / calvinNhobbes28 & Pexels / Jack Sparrow

There is no need for those people who turn every meal into a symphony of noises. I’m thrilled you’re enjoying your meal, but could you please enjoy it in silence, so I can enjoy mine?

Please Stay In Your Lane

cars on six-lane highway, text: going the speed limit or less in the left lane.
Photo Credit: Reddit / ScottMinnesota & Unsplash / Nikola Markelov
Photo Credit: Reddit / ScottMinnesota & Unsplash / Nikola Markelov

And in case it was unclear, your lane” would be the one on the right side of the road. You can go as slow as you want over there, but leave the left lane for those racing to their very important destinations.

We’ve All Got Places To Be

people waiting in line for transportation, text: skipping lines or trying to get into public transport while not everyone is out yet
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Peter Hong & Reddit / Electrical_potato_3
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Peter Hong & Reddit / Electrical_potato_3

Anyone who is waiting their turn in line or waiting to board a bus is in the exact same position as you; we’ve all got somewhere to be. Let everyone exit the bus before you push your way on.

Like Looking In A Mirror

phone on lock screen, text: having a picture of you as your lock or home screen
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Matt Seymour & Reddit / SlimJimma
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Matt Seymour & Reddit / SlimJimma

If it’s a picture of you with another person, then that’s a different story, but who sets a photo of only themselves as their lock screen? You already know who your phone belongs to, and you don’t need to be reminded of what your face looks like.

Crucial Dog-Walking Etiquette

dog walking on leash, text: walking your dog without a leash when you might encounter other dogs
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Andriyko Podilnyk & Reddit / Diet_Coke
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Andriyko Podilnyk & Reddit / Diet_Coke

Your dog might be a perfectly well-trained angel who loves everyone and just wants to calmly roam free, but not every dog is. Keep yours on a leash so everyone can enjoy their walk without extra stress.

Just Don’t Be This Person

abandoned shopping cart, text: leaving a shopping cart in the middle of a parking space in a packed parking lot
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Bruno Kelzer & Reddit / mywifiisbadtho
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Bruno Kelzer & Reddit / mywifiisbadtho

Seriously, there is no need for this. At the very least, if you can’t put in the small amount of effort it takes to walk the cart back to the corral or to the store, at least leave it in a place that doesn’t block other cars or spots.

You’d Better Take Your Food To Go

empty restaurant, text: going into a restaurant 15 minutes before it closes. People who do this are scum
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nick Karvounis & Reddit / Neblos2514
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nick Karvounis & Reddit / Neblos2514

There was a bit of a debate about this one, though this person has a strong opinion about it. There are some circumstances or restaurants where it might be okay to show up a few minutes before closing, but in general, please time your cravings better.