From working 40 hours a week to finishing up your final semester of college, or literally just finding the willpower to get out of bed every morning, trying to get through your weekly Monday to Friday is…a challenge.
The women below are in the depths of trying to survive the workweek, and while we’re going to cheer them on, we’re also going to laugh along the way.
Most Certainly Not Premeditated Murder
Growing up, you probably heard the saying that you should drink eight glasses of water per day for good health. But Heather has found out that in addition to giving her clearer skin, if someone is truly angering her and making the week drag on, it’s also a handy murder weapon.
Ladies, ladies, ladies, just remember: whether it’s about drinking water or murder, it’s all about moderation.
Narrator: Things Were Not Perf
If there was ever a slogan for the past two years of our lives, it would be: “Things were not perf.”
But if Delia needs to repeatedly type “Perf!” in order to get through the week, then I think it’s fair to say many of us would probably join her.
Cheer Up, Kid
These proud new parents recently celebrated the birth of their daughter, and, noticing the way she’s staring daggers at the camera, said that this is the “second day of life and my daughter is already not impressed.”
Cheer up, baby girl. Things are about to get so much worse!
A White Girl Misdemeanour
A mother-daughter duo frequently goes on “wine walks” where they take a stroll through the neighborhood while sipping glasses of wine. Savannah might call it a “misdemeanor,” but I call it “genius.”
Remember, ladies, it’s only illegal if you get caught.
A Blue’s Clues Reboot
Steve Burns, original host of the kids’ TV show Blue’s Clues released a video in time for the show’s 25th anniversary which explained why he left the show, but most importantly, that he’s proud of us.
If Steve’s blast from the past taught us anything, it’s what we millennials are hopeless, hapless, and helpless. Steve was always there to help us navigate the world of being a little kid, and Lord knows we need him now more than ever before.
Make It Worth My While
Many women are able to predict the exact day when they’ll get their period. Then comes the inevitable realization that in addition to Aunt Flow rudely interrupting your week is an incoming barrage of hormones and mood swings.
So if someone wants to make things easier for us and can draft this bill and hurry it up through Congress, that’d be great.
Can’t Argue With Science
I myself am a fan of random, fun facts, and it looks like Rachel is too (much to the dismay of her friends).
Perhaps Rachel is just a bonafide night owl, and if messaging people rapid-fire facts about the terminal velocity of cute little critters is how she gets through the week, then who are we to judge?
Having A Case Of The “Menty B’s”
Today’s youthful generations like coming up with slang that comically confuses older people, such as “YOLO,” “lit,” and “on fleek.” But how about “menty b”?
See, if you give it a cutesy name like “menty b,” having a mental breakdown doesn’t sound so bad. Is it terrible? Most certainly, but that’s not going to stop us from being in denial.
The Importance Of Self-Care
There’s been a lot of talk surrounding “self-care” lately, and as there should be because mental health is just as important as physical health. And it seems like Annam has found the perfect way to get through the week after a long day at work.
A glass of wine, a bubble bath, a scented candle, and blood-curdling screams loud enough to shatter glass. Ah yes, this sounds like the kind of “me day” I need.
That First Sip Of Coffee
Amanda’s secret to getting through the week is enjoying her morning cup of coffee in complete and utter silence. And just think, if you enjoy several cups of coffee, you can prolong the sweet, sweet sound of people shutting the hell up.
I don’t care whether you’re my manager, my parents, or my house is on fire. That first sip of coffee is sacred.
You Done Goofed Up
We’ve all been betrayed before by sending a private text to a close friend or family member that contains…proprietary information. But lo and behold, we eventually realize that we sent it to the wrong person, and usually, it’s the person we were trash-talking in the first place.
This woman learned the very painful lesson of always proofreading texts before clicking “Send.”
A Magical Trip To Costco
One of the hallmarks of being a responsible adult and parent is the weekly trips to the grocery store. Even though we’d rather be lying in bed, it’s something we gotta do, or else, you know, we’ll die. Thankfully Laura here is in mom mode and is just trying to help others survive it too.
…I mean, if she’s genuinely asking, I would like 50 pounds of rice and a kayak. Oh, and a rotisserie chicken.
Well, We Had A Good Run
Life has many paths and what works for one person might not work for another. But after years of trying, it looks like this woman has finally found her true calling.
Will she get far in life? Absolutely not, but we salute her commitment nonetheless.
Just Adult Things
Shower curtains are a decorative and creative way to showcase your personality within a bathroom, and they prevent water from ruining your floors. She should be excited.
Don’t be embarrassed over that! When I got my new countertop mixer I proudly showed it off to everyone who visited my home and I coddled it as if it were my firstborn child.
When Therapy Is Too Expensive
Everyone has their own way of taking care of themselves, but for those who need a little extra help, it’s unfortunate that therapy is so expensive.
So whether enjoying a glass of wine or a Mary Jane gummy, people simply have to do what’s best for them. (Seriously though, 50 milligrams?? Buckle up for that ride.)
The Joy Of Aging
If there’s one thing people aren’t comfortable addressing, it’s their own mortality. While no one likes to acknowledge that they too will eventually get old, it’s easy to see why people choose to be in denial for as long as humanly possible.
Ginny learned a very unpleasant lesson this week. Forget two-faced friends or bosses who not-so-secretly hate you—nothing is crueler than Father Time.
It’s The Storebought Life For Me
This husband explains that this was the end result of his wife using a frosting piping bag for the first time while baking a batch of cupcakes. Needless to say, it probably didn’t turn out quite the way she wanted it to.
Well goddammit, David, at least she tried! Unlike you, you judgemental donut.
Nowadays a lot of millennials have had to live with their parents for longer than they anticipated due to a tough job market and housing crisis.
But aside from the low, low price of her mental well-being, it looks like Madi over here is doing all right.