Straight Men Share The Weirdest Things They Were Told To Avoid In Order To Not Seem ‘Gay’

Despite all the progress we have made as a society in the past few decades, there’s still a lot of stigma surrounding being gay and the way people perceive it in relation to traditional masculinity. However, some fears about “seeming gay” are absolutely ridiculous.

These straight men on Reddit shared the most bizarre things they were told to avoid in order to avoid “looking gay” and we are so shocked.

Apparently, Straight Men Are Waterproof

umbrella levitating over lake
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Saffu // Text Credit: Reddit / PocketGuidetoACDs
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Saffu // Text Credit: Reddit / PocketGuidetoACDs

“Using an umbrella. To this day I remain stunned by how insecure some people are. I’m no remarkable example of confidence and self-assurance, but I just don’t get being so image concerned you feel you have to prove you’re tougher than rain.”

There Is No Winning Here

shaving razor on white background
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Brett Jordan // Text Credit: Reddit / ExploratorAnd2000
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Brett Jordan // Text Credit: Reddit / ExploratorAnd2000

“I’ve been called gay for shaving my body, but the thing is I am from a Mediterranean background, so if I don’t shave, people laugh at how much hair I have on my back, my belly, my legs…”

Fellas, Is Loving A Woman Gay?

man kissing forehead of girlfriend
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nathan McBride // Text Credit: Reddit / UNSCChipsDubbo
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nathan McBride // Text Credit: Reddit / UNSCChipsDubbo

“Spending time with a girl (especially choosing plans with a girlfriend) since it’s better to have bro time—nothing straighter than men, hanging about with men, talking about man stuff and doing man stuff, with men.”

Apparently, Looking Bad Is A Straight Thing

Man combing hair in bathroom
Photo Credit: George Marks / Retrofile / Getty Images // Text Credit: Reddit / cycloptian_tit
Photo Credit: George Marks / Retrofile / Getty Images // Text Credit: Reddit / cycloptian_tit

“I grew up being told by friends that using hair products was gay. Like, shampoo is okay, maybe conditioner, but even that was a little suspicious. It stuck with me more than I realized. I was in my late 20s before my wife convinced me to use some hair gel.”

It’s Such A Normal Thing To Do??

man squatting to pose for photo
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Lino Montes // Text Credit: Reddit / Zurrita16
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Lino Montes // Text Credit: Reddit / Zurrita16

“I was told by my very own father that squatting is gay. Just guess my confusion the first time I saw dudes squatting to pose for photos in a magazine.”

Is This Why Men Always Throw Out Their Straws At Clubs?

drink with a straw in it
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Sonnie Hiles // Text Credit: Reddit / AaronBklyn
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Sonnie Hiles // Text Credit: Reddit / AaronBklyn

“Drinking with a straw.”

Drinking with a straw is one of the neatest and easiest ways to consume something, and I truly pity any man who avoids it for fear of having something longer than it is wide in his mouth…

This Is So Sad

dad hugging his son, both smiling
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Joseph Gonzalez // Text Credit: Reddit / buildmeupbreakmedown
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Joseph Gonzalez // Text Credit: Reddit / buildmeupbreakmedown

“I knew a kid in middle school who stopped hugging his dad and grandpas because hugging another man was gay.”

It genuinely makes me so sad that young boys grow up touch starved because they’re taught that hugging another man is gay. Hugs are such a normal way to express love and care.

Must Be Super Inconvenient

shower with black and white tiles
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Andrea Davis // Text Credit: Reddit / Triple291
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Andrea Davis // Text Credit: Reddit / Triple291

“I wasn’t allowed to face away from the showerhead to rinse my hair as a child because that ‘was what girls do.'”

Facing away is the only logical way to properly wash out your hair, though.

Fellas, Is It Gay To Not Look Like Garbage?

man dressed in nice suit and man in nice casual streetwear walking together
Photo Credit: Christian Vierig / Getty Images // Text Credit: Reddit / i_heart_blondes
Photo Credit: Christian Vierig / Getty Images // Text Credit: Reddit / i_heart_blondes

“I was told that it is gay to match the colors of my clothes in an outfit or to simply carry a bag that’s small enough to be considered a purse.”

Even A Super Fruity Drink Isn’t “Gay”

A pint of beer is served at The Great British Beer Festival
Photo Credit: Peter Macdiarmid / Getty Images // Text Credit: Reddit / thoselusciouslips
Photo Credit: Peter Macdiarmid / Getty Images // Text Credit: Reddit / thoselusciouslips

“An American bartender working at an Irish pub I visited in Germany told me it was gay to not order a beer. I had asked what whiskeys they had available.”

What Is The Logic?

woman on top of man in bed
Photo Credit: Pexels / cottonbro // Text Credit: Reddit / aces-and-jacks
Photo Credit: Pexels / cottonbro // Text Credit: Reddit / aces-and-jacks

“When I was younger, my friends found out I went down on my girlfriend and they said that it was gay.”

Can someone explain how engaging in sexual activity with a woman as a man is gay?

Sounds Like It Would’ve Been Delicious

cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows
Photo Credit: Pexels / Fallon Michael // Text Credit: Reddit / kristofferreffotsirk
Photo Credit: Pexels / Fallon Michael // Text Credit: Reddit / kristofferreffotsirk

“My one friend didn’t want to try out the snickerdoodle hot chocolate a few years ago because it was gay. Now it’s discontinued and he never got to try it. But at least he’s not gay now.”

He Must Have Lived In Skid Mark City

man inside foggy shower
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Luka Medvedevas // Text Credit: Reddit / ecneicnos_97
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Luka Medvedevas // Text Credit: Reddit / ecneicnos_97

“I knew a guy in college who had never washed his butt in the shower because ‘that’s gay.’ He just figured the water running down his body was enough to clean him.”

How Else Are Men Supposed To Eat?

man chopping up tomatoes
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Max Delsid // Text Credit: Reddit / no_rolling_shutter
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Max Delsid // Text Credit: Reddit / no_rolling_shutter

“I’ve been told by several (mostly Boomer) men that loving to cook is ‘gay.’ How else am I gonna make dinner? I gotta eat, and if I’m gonna eat, I want to take the time to make something delicious.”

Add A Little Color To Your Life

man wearing blue socks with sliced oranges pattern with dress shoes
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Dimitri Houtteman // Text Credit: Reddit / TheTunoTurtle
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Dimitri Houtteman // Text Credit: Reddit / TheTunoTurtle

“Wearing socks in colors other than black and white or socks with any design or pattern.”

One thing I am happy about is seeing how many fun, patterned, and colorful dress socks are available at stores.

Very Conceited On Her Part

man pointing to something on female coworker's screen
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Icons8 Team // Text Credit: Reddit / iggybdawg
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Icons8 Team // Text Credit: Reddit / iggybdawg

“I’ve been accused by a female coworker of being gay because I didn’t flirt with her.”

To be honest, this seems more like her being a touch conceited while projecting her weird insecurities onto him.

You’re Straight, Not Blind

good-looking, well-dressed man giving smouldering look
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nojan Namdar // Text Credit: Reddit / SJG36
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nojan Namdar // Text Credit: Reddit / SJG36

“Recognize/complement another man’s looks, as if men don’t recognize when other men look better than them. We are built to recognize competition and stack ourselves against it to see how we fair with women.”

That’s Oddly Specific And Ridiculous

close up of man's hands
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nsey Benajah // Text Credit: Reddit / nashuanuke
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Nsey Benajah // Text Credit: Reddit / nashuanuke

“Not a personal anecdote, but one of my favorites from the thankfully now-defunct gay conversion camps: when examining your fingernails, look at them as a fist with your palm towards your face, not with your fingers spread out and your palm facing away.”

It’s Just A Color, Dude

purple smoke cloud
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Ingmar GG // Text Credit: Reddit / illadelchronic
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Ingmar GG // Text Credit: Reddit / illadelchronic

“The guy I work for angrily asked why I filled a cell in a spreadsheet with purple, and can I change it because he won’t use it like that. I asked if the data was wrong. Nope, he thought it was a ‘gay color.'”

Uno Reverse Card Him!

two young boys having a pillow fight
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Allen Taylor // Text Credit: Reddit / rinneganadrian
Photo Credit: Unsplash / Allen Taylor // Text Credit: Reddit / rinneganadrian

“My uncle would walk in on me and my cousin wrestling or fighting when we were about 10-years-old, he’d say to stop fighting because it’s gay (I’m guessing he thought that would make us stop), but one time, my cousin deadpan said, ‘So you came to watch?'”