When you’re casually dating, it can feel like you’re looking for a diamond in the rough.
Of course, no diamond is going to be perfect when you first find it, and just like a diamond, any new relationship is going to take some polishing to get to its full potential.
Could Someone Be Pushing You To Lower Your Standards?
Still, when you’re looking for that “diamond” relationship to start working on, you will have to make decisions about how much you’re willing to bend your standards to make something work.
Flexibility is always important, but it’s possible that the person you’re dating is subtly pushing you to lower your standards to stay in a crappy relationship.
People Who Set Standards Usually Follow Them Closely
While compromise and flexibility are great qualities to have, it’s a slippery slope if you start to lose your standards in the process.
If you start to notice any of the following signs, it’s probably time to shut it down and bail on whatever your situationship is.
Compromise Has Become A Huge Part Of Your Dating Life
Compromise is supposed to be about two people meeting in the middle.
If you’re always the person who is going the distance to make things work, it’s not a good fit.
Little Things Can Add Up To Big Things Fairly Quickly
Do you always agree to meet on their terms, whenever they are available? Or maybe you’re constantly driving across the city to meet them but they rarely come to your place?
These little things can add up, and it’s important to remember that someone should be willing to put in equal effort to see you.
He Tries To Make You Feel Like You’re Being Too Needy
Communication is key in any stage of a relationship, but you don’t want to be with someone who is constantly blowing up your phone.
On the flip side, it’s normal to check in with the person you’re dating. Not because you need to, but because you want to. If he’s ignoring you or making comments like, “Chill, I’ll answer when I can,” it’s a sign to bail.
He Tells You He’s Bored All The Time
If he’s complaining that he’s bored but putting in zero effort to plan or suggest exciting new activities, it could be because he’s lazy.
He might be trying to get you used to the idea that he’ll put in less effort when it comes to doing things together.
There Is A Subtle Lack Of Respect
Something as simple as him brushing off your career choice, or the way that he speaks to a server in a restaurant can tell a lot about his respectfulness.
It may not be obvious at first, but if you end up dating a person who has a lack of respect, it could come back to bite you.
He Talks Down To You Or Has A Sense Of Entitlement
A lack of respect can include an overall sense of entitlement, arrogance, and/or condescending and rude remarks that are slipped into casual conversation.
It’s not worth lowering your standards to be with someone who talks down to you.
He’s Overly Interested In Superficial Things
This one might be harder to spot, but if he’s asking you specific questions about your job, salary, or physical habits (like how often you hit the gym), he might be showing you he’s not a good match.
It’s possible his standards are too high and he doesn’t even realize it, but you shouldn’t have to lower yours to meet him.
He’s Always Putting Down Other Happy Couples
When a guy sees another happy couple in public and feels the need to say something like, “That’s so corny,” he’s basically letting you know that you can’t expect that kind of attention from him.
Judging other couples for their decisions is an easy way to say, “I would never do that.”