People Share Their Shower Thoughts On How Messed Up Marriage Actually Is

Marriage is usually depicted as winning the lottery ticket in relationships. It’s supposed to be the ultimate sign of love and commitment.

Yet, if you really think about it, it’s nothing more than a legal piece of paper. The actual wedding is also just an overpriced party. Keep on reading for more wedding and marriage shower thoughts!

Bad Luck To See The Bride’s Dress Before The Wedding

wedding dress on mannequin
Photo Credit: Charisse Kenion / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Charisse Kenion / Unsplash

“Whoever created the tradition of not seeing the bride in the wedding dress beforehand saved countless husbands everywhere from hours of dress shopping and will forever be a hero to all men.” —Yorkshire45 / Reddit

It also avoids getting conflicting opinions. Even if they don’t like the dress, they’re stuck with it when they see it.

It’s Downhill After The Wedding Day

bride and groom sharing a chair
Photo Credit: Blake Cheek / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Blake Cheek / Unsplash

“People get so focused on their wedding that they forget there’s an actual marriage afterward.” —unicornhunter72 / Reddit

This is why it’s so important to only get married once a healthy foundation has been established. Then, to focus on the wedding day as a celebration for both parties, not an opportunity to be a bridezilla.

Renewing Wedding Vows Should Be Required

wedding bands in their boxes on written vows
Photo Credit: Ty Welsh / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Ty Welsh / Unsplash

“Marriage licenses should have an expiration date like driver licenses. That way people could just not renew instead of going through a long divorce process.” —TiggerDL / Reddit

It just seems like a mature decision and would avoid requiring prenups. Plus, it would help couples not feel stuck in their marriage.

It’s The Ones Closest That Hurt The Most

man puts hands on window like a shadow
Photo Credit: Stefano Pollio / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Stefano Pollio / Unsplash

“The fact that the first person they suspect after someone is murdered is the spouse tells me everything I need to know about marriage.” —xproofx / Reddit

This may be depressing, but it’s true. On the other hand, you don’t have to testify against a spouse.

A Once-In-A-Lifetime Opportunity

bride and groom in sunset looking at each other
Photo Credit: Isaiah Rustad / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Isaiah Rustad / Unsplash

“Marriage is one of the few things where we consider someone an expert if they’ve only successfully done it once.” —wehappy3 / Reddit

To this day, there is stigma around divorce and second or third marriages. Just because someone had the courage to walk out of something that turned toxic doesn’t mean that they don’t deserve another chance at it.

Dress Costs Vs Tuxedos

Man in tuxedo fixing bow tie
Photo Credit: Volodymyr Bahrii / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Volodymyr Bahrii / Unsplash

“Why are wedding dresses bought and tuxedos rented? The utility of each is such that it should be the other way around.” —the_humeister / Reddit

Not to mention renting a tuxedo costs a fraction of wedding dress prices. Plus it’s not like the bride ever gets to wear her dress again.

The Whole Proposal Act

man putting engagement ring on woman's finger
Photo Credit: Andre Jackson / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Andre Jackson / Unsplash

“Marriage proposals are weird. The proposer gets to take as long as he/she wants to determine whether they want to spend the rest of their life with someone. The proposee is expected to make a split-second decision.” —PRGuyHere / Reddit

Plus, even in 2021, it’s still expected for a woman to wait around for her man to make that move.

The Cost Of A Wedding Could Be Better Invested

hand holding money on fire
Photo Credit: Jp Valery / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Jp Valery / Unsplash

“Considering the divorce rate, it’d be better if people spent less money on weddings, and more money on marriage counseling.” —NopeyNope_the_5th / Reddit

In 2021, the average cost of a U.S. wedding is between $29K-$31K. That money could better be spent on building a life together than on a one-day party.

Time Is Relative Anyway

Q-tips in cylinder box
Photo Credit: Sigmund / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Sigmund / Unsplash

“In a 500-day period I could theoretically meet someone, get married, have a baby, and get divorced—and yet I’d still be using the same box of Q-tips.” —nXanadu / Reddit

Considering that marriages are supposed to last a lifetime, maybe that time can be spent more productively with more independence.

Gender Roles Are Still A Thing

woman doing laundry with headphones on
Photo Credit: Averie Woodard / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Averie Woodard / Unsplash

“Marriage is marketed as the beginning of a woman’s life, but the end of a man’s.” —sun-moon-siberian / Reddit

It’s like men are the only ones given the freedom of their bachelor days while women are only meant to have babies and clean houses.

It’s Just As Bad To Be A Guest

bridesmaid wearing floral crown looking down
Photo Credit: Omar Lopez / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Omar Lopez / Unsplash

“Having to attend a wedding you don’t want to is worse than having to attend a funeral. At least at the funeral, you don’t have to pretend you’re happy to be there.” —Corvus_Manufaktura / Reddit

Between the costs of buying a dress to wear, accommodation, and travel, costs add up just as much for guests who feel obligated to attend.

Love Is Kinda Ironic

man, woman, and dog on couch
Photo Credit: Sarandy Westfall / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Sarandy Westfall / Unsplash

“The more serious a relationship gets, the more casual it is.” —Reddit

If you think about it, you go from trying to impress them with a three-course dinner and roses, to using the bathroom with the door open and walking around unshowered for a week without caring.

There Is Only One Possible End

wedding bands in rain on the ground
Photo Credit: Zoriana Stakhniv / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Zoriana Stakhniv / Unsplash

“A successful marriage ends with watching the other person die.” —WhiteVanilla69 / Reddit

Technically, there are two ways for a marriage to end. Either in divorce or once one of you dies. Both sound pretty unpleasant.

Rain Is Not Good Luck On A Wedding Day

bride and groom kiss under umbrella
Photo Credit: Victoria Prissnitz / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Victoria Prissnitz / Unsplash

“Whoever said that rain on your wedding day is good luck was just trying to calm down an anxious bride.” —bob_loblaw1999

All that rain does on a wedding day is ruin the bride’s hair after she spent $300 on it, make everyone cold, and if it’s an outdoor wedding, it just destroys it.

The Truth About Seating Arrangements

wedding table arrangement with blue tablecloth
Photo Credit: Mayron Oliveira / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Mayron Oliveira / Unsplash

“Weddings are weird because it’s totally socially acceptable to get all your friends and family together, sort them by how much you like them, and place them at tables that show the ranking based on proximity to you.” —Tommy84 / Reddit

No one wants to be seated at the “singles’ table” with your weird cousins at the very back.

Think About All The Options

crowd of people crossing street
Photo Credit: Ryoji Iwata / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Ryoji Iwata / Unsplash

“Saying yes on your wedding day is saying no to 7.53 billion people.” —22_miran / Reddit

We’re not saying don’t ever get married, just make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons. Because if you’re settling, there are over 7 billion other people you can choose from.