When someone shows you who they are you’re supposed to believe them, but sometimes that’s easier said than done. Many people stay in friendships or relationships long past their expiration date because they can’t or don’t want to see what’s in front of them.
Eventually, though, you’re going to have a moment when the clouds clear and you realize that those people you spend all your energy on caring for or helping won’t do the same for you when you need them.
Clearly, They Weren’t Above Taking Sides
It’s strange that their friends would blatantly choose sides if this person and their ex are on friendly terms, but not everything in life is going to make sense to everyone.
Friendship Isn’t Only About Taking What You Need
“I would never hear from anyone unless they needed something, usually when they wanted it for free.” —Reddit / YrCrepsAreWeak
A friendship is supposed to be based on giving and taking, not just taking.
Imagine How Uncomfortable That Man Must Have Felt
Not only must that man who overheard this exchange have been uncomfortable, but we have no doubt that the person on the receiving end of this comment was pretty darn uncomfortable too.
Sometimes You Need An Outside Perspective
You may not have been willing to see it before, but once a person on the outside points it out—especially after an event like this one—it’s pretty hard to defend your so-called friends.
You Should Infiltrate Her Friend Group
“When I broke up with a girl that I had dated for less than 5 months and they all abandoned me for her and then found out they all were taking a trip to Colorado together and nobody bothered to tell me. I found that out on Facebook.” —Reddit / nslusz
A Tough Way To Learn A Lesson
This would be the final nail in the coffin for a whole lot of friendships. It might have been the first and only nail, but a nail no less. They’ve shown their true colors, and you have to see that.
They Were Just There To Sit Back And Be Quiet
If someone tells you to stop talking when you try to tell them something, or only values your opinion when it benefits them, or always takes more than they’re willing to give, they’re not your real friend. Plain and simple.
You Can Do Better Than Them
“Me and two girls were walking down the street and they completely ignored me, so I was walking behind them. Then I decided to just turn around and walk back home. They didn’t notice and never asked where I went. That really hurt.” —Reddit / fetteartig
Phones Work Both Ways
People choose what they want to see. In her mind, you were the one who cut the friendship off because you never contact her, but you know it’s just the pot calling the kettle black.
No Friendship Is Worth This Much Effort
“When I realized that I was practically harassing them to hang out with me. You just gotta get some self-respect and learn to let it go.” —Reddit / bee-have
Spend your energy on people who actually want to receive it.
Cut Your Losses And Run
It’s pretty hard to come back from a betrayal like this one. You’d be hard pressed to give us a good reason why we should allow our friends to rip us off for hundreds of dollars.
No More Social Media, No More Connections
“When I got rid of Facebook. On the plus side, it did show me who the real friends were and who I was willing to keep up a meaningful relationship with.” —Reddit / Unwieldyboar
Friends Would Believe You
All relationships are built around trust, whether they’re romantic or platonic. If you don’t trust your friends and don’t believe them when they tell you something, are you really friends?
A Common Realization
It’s fairly common for people to realize once they’re out of middle school or high school that the friendships they thought would last forever were actually more out of convenience than the desire to be friends.
The Party Got Moved To Another House
“When I got ill, once they realized I could no longer throw parties for them they all left.” —Reddit / Generations18
Clearly, these are not the kind of people that you want to spend your time or energy on anyway.
Leave Them On Read And Move On
How many unanswered texts do you want to write off as the person just being busy before you realize that maybe they’re simply choosing to be too busy to answer you?
Putting Two And Two Together
There’s a saying that if someone will talk about others with you, they’ll talk about you with others, and that seems to ring true in many situations including this one.
The Quotations Are Key
“When I realized that my two ‘best friends’ just came over to mess with me and make fun of me together.” —Reddit / SmokeWineEveryday
Based on the quotation marks, we’re going to assume this person must have realized that a best friend wouldn’t be doing this.
Find The Friendship That Works For You
What someone defines as friendship could look different than what you’d consider a friendship, but the most important thing is finding friends who share the same view as you. Find the people who can give you the interaction and level of connection that you want or need.
A Lesson For Everyone
Admitting that a friendship isn’t right for you or moving on from someone toxic can be a difficult process, but it gets to the point where you have to look at where you’re spending all your energy.