Filtering through all the crappy options in the dating pool can be kind of exhausting. Thankfully, some people are really out here putting their worst qualities on display to make it a bit easier for you to cross them off the list of candidates.
If you have ever received a message like one of the ones below, it’s time to heed the red flag’s warning and head for the hills. You don’t need that stress in your life.
Any Text That Comes Randomly After 1 A.M.
If they randomly text you after 1 a.m. but rarely make an effort to text you during the day, it’s likely that they’re just looking for a hookup and nothing else.
Feel free to shut it down like this person did, or just don’t answer a 1 a.m. text, like ever.
The Dreaded “You Up?” Text
The classic “You up?” or even worse, “U up?” text should never be acceptable. They’re not even trying at that point.
It’s an even more direct form of the booty call message that has one specific end goal: hooking up.
The One-Word “Haha” Response
There is nothing more frustrating than trying to carry out a conversation and getting four letters in return: “Haha.” You’re not trying to be a standup comedian here, just looking for a connection.
If someone is wasting your time repeatedly sending “Haha,” they are not interested or just straight-up too lazy to carry on a conversation. In the words of pop culture icon Sweet Brown, ain’t nobody got time for that.
“Sorry, I Missed Your Message”
If a man left you on “read” you for a couple of days and then out of the blue says, “Sorry, I missed your message,” he is serving up a steamy pile of bull crap.
That’s not how phones work, Brad. Just say you were busy or didn’t want to answer right away. Odds are if he wanted to chat or hang out he would not be “missing” those messages.
A text that says “Hey stranger” usually comes a few weeks or months after the last time you talked.
You both stopped talking for a reason, and texting “Hey stranger” is such a crappy, cliché way of trying to start a conversation again. You’re not a stranger, after all, they could at least try a little harder to start a conversation.
They Start Telling You What To Wear Or How To Dress
If someone starts sending you unsolicited wardrobe advice, it’s time to cut them loose. Unless you are dating Tyra freaking Banks, they have no business telling you what to wear.
No person is worth changing your personal style or comfort level for, especially if it’s for a controlling or jealous reason.
Being Controlling Over Your Clothing Can Spiral Quickly
If someone is telling you what to wear before you’re even dating, they could easily escalate into a controlling partner like the person who sent these texts.
It may not look as obvious as this, but if you’re seeing texts like, “I hate when big girls wear yoga pants,” or, “Only girls who want attention show their cleavage,” it’s a bad sign.
Always Asking “Where Are You?”
If the person you’re dating is obsessively checking in with you, it’s only going to get worse as the relationship develops.
This text is an example of someone who is way too controlling and insecure to be in a healthy relationship.
Sending You “Check-In” Texts When They Know You’re With Friends
A healthy and trusting relationship does not require checking in with someone constantly to see what they’re doing. Nobody wants to be the friend who is obsessively checking their phone while they’re out.
Twenty questions from a partner will start to become annoying and feel more like a chore than a relationship.
“I’ll Let You Know About Meeting Up”
If you’re trying to make plans with someone and they respond with anything along the lines of “I’ll let you know closer to the date,” or “I’ll have to check my schedule and get back to you,” it’s time to reconsider.
Once or twice is understandable, but if it becomes a regular habit to only meet on their terms and they never commit to meeting up, they are not worth your time.
“I Guess You’re Busy” After You Haven’t Responded
If someone has the audacity to send an “I guess you’re busy” text when you haven’t answered them after a short period of time, they 100% deserve a Captain Obvious award because, duh?
People won’t always be able to respond right away and if the person you’re dating doesn’t see that, it’s time to send them packing. The text might as well say what it means which is “I’m needy and annoying.”
“Who Are You With?”
There’s a good chance that the person you’re talking to does not know all your friends and family, so why do they care which ones you’re hanging out with?
There is a difference between getting to know you and getting up in your business without reason. If they always want to know who is in your close circle and why, it’s a red flag you should take seriously.
“Send Me A Pic”
For any ladies who have not been in the dating pool for a while, be warned about this terrible message that creepy dudes will definitely send.
Asking for a “nude” or a “pic” of any kind is so immature and weird if you’re not in a relationship with the person. Asking for pictures on Snapchat is not romantic, and if they’re asking you they’re probably asking a lot of people.
“What Are You Wearing?”
If someone is asking you what you’re wearing, it’s not because they’re genuinely curious about your outfit choices. It’s because they’re curious about what’s underneath, or what you’re not wearing.
If you’re looking for an actual connection with someone who will respect you enough to get to know you before asking to see you naked, this is not the person for you.
“What’s Your Body Count?”
If someone asks you this in a text message, they deserve a swift block and delete, but there really are people who will try it.
Talking about your sexual history is not something that you need to do over text, especially with someone you don’t know very well. It’s an invasion of privacy at this stage in the game and a great excuse to say see-ya-bye.