I Don’t Know Who Needs To Read These Tweets, But It’s Probably You
Life is complex and really hard. I constantly feel like a bumblebee just aimlessly flying around, bumping into things, and trying to figure the basics out. With so much going on in our individual lives, it's easy to get caught up in our own circumstances and lose sight of some hard truths.
Here are some things that you might need to hear in order to snap you back to reality and get you on track.
Men Rarely Will Change For You
I know you love him, care about him, and want to have him in your future, but he's not going to suddenly become someone worthy of your love and attention. Stop waiting on him to grow up and instead move on.
But It's So Yummy...
This one hurt my feelings because I spent a whole year drinking iced vanilla lattés for breakfast every day. However, I will admit the error of my ways and say that you should at least add a blueberry muffin to the meal.
Please, Before You Start Getting Charges On Your Credit Card!
I'll be the first to admit that I'm an absolute sucker for a free trial. I'm broke, and if I can get three months of free music streaming, I'm taking it. Just don't forget to cancel before the charges come through.
Life Is Too Short To Wear The Wrong Cup Size
I get that bras are expensive, but please invest in ones that fit properly if you have the financial ability to do so. If you have to wear one of these bad boys on the daily, it should at least be comfortable.
You Hate To Hear It, But...
I'll give you a free pass if you're using a makeup wipe after a long night out before you fall asleep because you're already in bed, but use regular face wash on a day to day basis.
Redirect That Energy To Something Worthwhile
Okay, so I've clowned around before and wasted months of my life pining over someone who was not ready or willing to get into a relationship, and if I had just worked on myself I could probably do basic math by now.
It's Not Worth The Effort
We get it: you're furious, or hurt, or upset, or any emotion that warrants you to want to send a long rant to the person who made you feel that way. Trust me, it won't fix anything - don't do it.
Seriously, Stop Obsessing Over Them!
In a world where social media influencers, Facetune, and Photoshop are commonplace, it's easy to focus on our perceived imperfections. Stretch marks and body fat are completely normal - don't get hung up on them.
...And Your Blending Sponge!
We all know that we're supposed to wash our makeup brushes regularly, but honestly, none of us actually wash them nearly as often as we should. Let this be your reminder to clean them.
No, You Should Not Get Bangs!!!!
I've had a couple of these moments during my darkest moments and, no matter how awful you feel, do NOT cut your hair while you're in a bad mental state. You do NOT want bangs.
Don't Let The Strawberries Go To Waste!
I know that you have a full container of mixed-greens that you bought for $4.99 last week during your grocery haul and have not touched since. Start making salads and use it before the leaves are all wilted.
Girl, Just Put Your Phone On Do-Not-Disturb And Call It A Night
Ladies, picture this: it's midnight when he asks if you want to come over and hang out. You contemplate it for a moment, but then decide to go to bed instead, saving yourself $20. You wake up energized the next day. Life is good.
Stop Jumping The Gun With Your Feelings
As a hopeless romantic, I know how easy it is to get caught up in the idea of being with someone way too fast. Sometimes, it's better to pace yourself and think about whether you actually like them, or the attention.
Learn How To Budget!
Okay, I get that you want to buy the new pair of Lululemon leggings, but please make sure you can afford rent and groceries before making the purchase. Do you even need them?
There Is No Room For Self-Hate In 2019
It's easy to be critical of the way we look and the shapes of our bodies, but please try to be kind to yourself. You're fine as you are. You don't need to change in order to be loveable.
You Know That Guy...
This is the guy who stepped on your feelings before ghosting you, but still lurks to watch all of your stories. Block him, sis! He doesn't deserve to watch you and you'll feel better no longer seeing his name in your notifications.
For Real, Stay Single Until It's Worth It To Not Be
With every passing year that I get older, I worry that I need to settle down with someone before I end up alone forever. However, I swear it's better to be alone than to be with someone who makes you feel alone.
We've All Either Been There Or Know Someone Who Was
When the guy who is significantly older than you, especially when you're still a teenager, tries to date you, it's not cute: it's predatory and gross. Do not trust him or his intentions.
Bottles Are Not Decor!
Okay, this isn't directed at you, but just about all of us have had the misfortune of walking into a man's home and this is the only "decoration" in the house. Please, Brad, return them for 15 cents a pop.
You're Doing Great Sweetie
It can be hard to get through each day, and you may not be exactly where you want to be at the moment. That's okay. You're doing your best, and you'll get there eventually. I'm rooting for you.
